So I did some thinking since my last post on being a conversationalist where I bashed routines and things of that sort. Well I am still not a fan of them even though they may work at times, but that is just my personality. I have figured out why it pains me to see them being used. The people I see using them are all socially un-calibrated, which is why all their lines, negs, routines just feel off an don't get the result they intend to.

The people using them need to spend more time observing and talking to people, but not concentrating on themselves. You need to be observing the reactions of whom you are conversing with. Be fully absorbed with the other person and not in your own mind. Doing this you will gain social calibration. You will learn to predict how people will react to what you say and when you say it. You begin to see when something is missed timed or not appropriate and when you will get a bad reaction.

All this pick up material sure it helps, but if you are un-calibrated socially then doing all these things make you come off as a creep. These routines and such work, but the context in which they can be used is very limited and in order to use them effectively you have to be able to anticipate reactions. Example would be you and a girl are talking about her job as a lawyer and suddenly you decide to jump into an attraction building routine.... wtf is gonna go through her mind and creep! This routine comes out of no where and out of context aka un-calibrated. Instead of building attraction it can instantly kill it.

Work on your social calibration before doing any of this pick up stuff. That does not mean stop talking to girls and approaching them because you should always be doing that. It means before you start trying out techniques learn when those techniques will be most effective first. Otherwise you will not get the intended effect and usually get the opposite effect.

You have to become more socially aware of your surroundings start noticing the subtleties and unspoken rules. When you become highly socially calibrated you become "smooth". When you are "smooth" you will know when a routine will add value to a conversation verses take it away.

A lot of people who get into pick up did not have very active social lives not all, but the majority. You do not have the proper social calibration to be using these pick up material things, and learning them is a waste of time because they will be ineffective. Instead work on becoming socially adjusted first. This takes time and the only way to do this is go out more an hang out with people, and pay close attention to interactions and reactions. You will begin to pick up on things you never noticed before.

Once you become socially calibrated you will notice how off the timing is of the majority of people using these routines and negs. You will know better and be able to use them to add value not lose it.

Here are is some material to read on social calibration:

http://www.girlschase.com/content/faux-pas-sociaux-nouveaux

http://www.girlschase.com/content/secrets-getting-girls-better-jerk

http://www.girlschase.com/content/archive-ultimate-social-calibration-stop-climbing-social-ladder