I usually load up Venti lattes with an extra shot of espresso before a first date to ensure I'm in a talkative mood. If I time things right I will be extremely energetic and very talkative at the peak of the date. I do get some jittery body movement that can be difficult to control but I manage by sitting on my hands.

As to the irrational thing, well, part of my routine has incorporated taking some Beano with my coffee to try to control the obligatory gas that results from drinking lots of strong coffee on an empty stomach.

Last weekend I had secured a date with a cute curly haired Puerto Rican girl from OK Cupid. Well as luck would have it I mistakenly grabbed the wrong pills when I was running out the door ( I was running late because the laundry complex at my apartments dryer was not working right but that another story) and instead of grabbing my Beano pills I accidentally grabbed Valerium root- a sleep aid.

Well as you probably guessed it, mid way through my Venti latte I downed two pills and before I got to the bottom of my latte, I realized this. Now I wasn't about to have a first meeting with this princess with my mental state being the battleground for a caffeine vs. sleep-aid fight to the death. I suppose the rational thing would have been to call her and reschedule. But alas, I was the irrational seducer this day.

I made a bee line to the bathroom and managed to induce vomiting. The combination of stomach acid and the acidity of coffee was hell on my throat but I was able to actually make out both of the Valerian root pills so I was in no danger of the sleep aid befuddling my mind.

However, I had vomited at least a Grande's worth of coffee into the toilet leaving me with the caffeine buzz not even equivalent to a Tall. I figured I would order a Tall tea lattee and a Dopio espresso shot to try to balance things out.

Somehow this combination got me wired and put me in a really strange place. All at once I got extremely euphoric and confident and decided to chat up a girl that was sitting down on the other end of the table as me.

I must admit that I was so upped up that I wasn't completely aware of my surroundings and what I was saying. I definitely approached with confidence and she didn't dismiss me or anything but it was me doing pretty much all the talking. I opened with a comment about how she was using a Samsung laptop and that how it was really cool and mentioned something about Gus from Breaking Bad using a Samsung at the end of Season 4 but I guess she has never seen Breaking Bad.

I wasn't sure where to go from there so I segwayed into commenting on situational things and I went back to her computer and started giving my opinion about Microsoft's up and coming Windows 8 and the metro interface.

Thinking back I should not have gone into as much detail as I did and her body language and eye contact didn't seem to convey deep interest but when I get started about the loss of functionality on the desktop from the Metro interface vs. any perceived benefits from improved usability in a tablet computer I become impassioned.

I wanted to ask for her number but instead I thoght I would play it cool and just give her my number if she wanted to hang out sometime. I then slid back to where I was sitting now a bit worried that she would see me with the girl I was about to be meeting. Luckily she left almost immediately after I scooted away.

So the girl I was originally going to meet was running a bit late. Like as in 45 minutes. Well when she finally did show up I was starting to crash hard. My head was pouding and it wasn't until after she showed up that I noticed that I had some vomit on my shirt from my earlier purging.

This made me crash even more. We had a brief conversation about OK Cupid and how maybe meeting people in real life was better. We both agreed that the weather was kind of bad and that meeting another time might be a better idea. I'm gonna wait a few days and text her.