You walk to the front of the line...

nittutt · 2013-01-11T13:37:43+00:00

What is this supposed to be?

robot_army_mutiny · 2013-01-11T14:54:37+00:00

Surprise no longer registers as you dive into your rehearsed-a-billion-times DHV story. Pre-selection, check. Leader of men, check. You throw in a new thread, "do you like horses?," you ask her, and go back to your story as she nods her head yes. You are two steps ahead, and it pours out of you without thinking. Apparently, it's going over ok, because they are listening like a group of toddlers to Blue's Clues for the 10th time that day. But you are delivering all this to the two obstacles, only throwing the target a glance on occasion.

The second obstacle breaks in with some retarded comment you reminded her of. This shit is playing out like a hundred times before, you recognize, and throw her a smile as you continue on.

Break again, and tell hb that there was a girl in grade school that loved horses so much, she used to run around at recess pretending to ride one. Back to your lines, back to the obstacles. Back at hb: "And you look just like her."

They all laugh. You are in. Wing #1 sees this as his cue to re-enter the group, hb in tail. "Oh, you know player, I see. I can't bring this cat out without him attracting a crowd!" Hb smiles and starts to play with her hair...

robot_army_mutiny · 2013-01-11T14:05:19+00:00

On the way there, you listened to Eazy E Real Muthafuckin' G's, or whatever gets your dick hard, at full volume. Maybe you took a couple propranalol or a bump to nullify your anxiety. Met your boys there and opened some bullshit sets on the street - gay guys, ugly girls, the unapproachably hot girl handing out drink coupons - anything that gets your confidence up, because the first few sets are just practice. By the time you go inside somewhere, you are completely in character.

robot_army_mutiny · 2013-01-11T14:28:16+00:00

It doesn't matter that you look like BrickTop from Snatch, you tell yourself. Because you have the balls of BrickTop. But you have nothing. Panic is beginning to set in. All those days spent at the mall making random hb's feel awkward are going to pay off, you tell yourself. You haven't been laid since you started this game. But then you laugh at yourself and remember. It's just a game. "It's all in da game," you recite in your best mental impression of Omar from The Wire. Your ego bounces back to 110%. You want to punch some douchebag in the stomach. Instead, you turn back to the booth, still unaware of what your next move will be. "Fuck it," you say, aloud...

robot_army_mutiny · 2013-01-11T14:39:22+00:00

"You're still here?" you ask her as you walk back up. Her two friends have appeared.

"Uhm, yeah." She says, as her friends watch in enraptured silence.

"What's going on," her friend asks. Panic is back, tunnel vision ensues. "It's all in the game," you think, as you reach for your beer in silence.

And then some part of your subconscious rushes forth and takes over. All of that practice did become second nature. "I've got nothin'," it says. "I just wanted to get your attention," it says as you make room for yourself beside the closest obstacle. Clearly, you have it, because they are all looking at you like deer lost in your headlights.

Your go-to opener starts spilling out of your mouth on autopilot, because this is now a new set. They are lost. But the punchline is perfectly delivered, as you have learned to do over the last 200 approaches. You don't stop to let it sink in, though. Neg the target. Plow. The tide is turning. You're doing all of the talking, but that is how it is supposed to be right now...

robot_army_mutiny · 2013-01-11T15:25:02+00:00

That's it, you're out of canned material. But momentum is gaining. You kick wing#1. "So how do you guys know each other," he asks. They reply something. He launches into his own DHV, but hb is all eyes on you.

"Let me borrow your friend for a minute, I've been ignoring her, you say to the group." It's absolute rubbish, but it works. They are caught up in wing#1's story now. You take her towards the bar, and order a water. She wants to buy you a real drink, and one for herself. So it goes.

You tell her a story about growing up, as you return to the booth. She seems to hesitate, says "No, let's go over here. I want to hear more."

Wing #2 has introduced himself to the group, along with a few friends he pulled on his own. It's your party to crash, but you are busy making out with hb.

At some point it dissolves though. The girls go troll for drinks or something. You and your crew leave for another set. But the girls quickly end up back, "We came back because you were the most interesting," she tells you.

You utter something overly dickish, and regret it. But she punches you in the shoulder, another IOI. You laugh and lead her to the front patio. The two of you share a cigarette, and banter. You kiss her again.

You get her #, you have to go meet some friends. Call her right there so that "she has your # as well." Later you text her that you guys are going to eat at X, and they should join if they want to. While you're eating, they show up. Of course.

You go home alone, but with a new friend on tap. She texts you "goodnight. I had fun."

You beat off thinking about hb. So many things you could have done differently. But your friends respect you, and you all look forward to tomorrow night's sarge. Who knows, maybe you will see hb out. Either way, you'll be meeting more hb's, you know.

And to think, this time last year you were afraid to talk to a strange girl in public...

robot_army_mutiny · 2013-01-11T13:56:09+00:00

"Who are you?" she asks. You don't answer.

A few seconds go by. "Want to hear the world's shortest joke?" you say. She just looks at you in a state of pure confusion.

"My dick," you reply, deadpan. A few more seconds. You crack up. A look of astonishment. All subterfuge is blown. "Watch this," you say as you continue smiling and get up. "Stay here."

Title	You walk to the front of the line...
Author	robot_army_mutiny
Upvotes	0
Comments	12
Date	January 11, 2013 1:32 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/16dm12/you_walk_to_the_front_of_the_line/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/you-walk-to-the-front-of-the-line.1345659 https://theredarchive.com/post/1345659

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