Jumpiness. That feeling of extreme excitment toward waiting for something. A few months ago, I broke up with my Gf of 3 years (on and off). It was a dumb decision that weeks ago I began regretting. Surges of emotions, blah blah. Long story short; she moved on and I wanted her back. No sympathy is needed. I knew the situation was ridiculous, but we want what we can't have. That on top of knowing that we both loved eachother but she had moved on absolutely killed me. Right down to the fiber. So there I sat, a loser in my own right; I had recently quit my dead end job, was running out of money and now had no one to hold. Rock bottom some would say. I couldn't stand to look at myself. Then I found this place. Its not a Utopia by far, nor some perfect place for thosebof us who just don't know what to do. But it is a beginning. An article here, some self motivation there, and I feel a lot better about myself. I've picked up new language, Italian. Im teaching it to myself. Guitar was a hobby in high school, so I turned my old 12 string into a 6 string so there wouldn't be an excuse to not practice. Ontop of improving my writing ability, which was always my gift, I'm getting a driving job to hold me over until I've pestered the Dealership that I'm going after for my Mechanic career. improvement. I'm not a PUA, but I've spent time just making eye contact with girls out in public. Its great when they look away first. Even gotten a few numbers, though no responses, which sucks but oh well. I feel great about myself and where I'm pushing. But there is one problem. I spent 3 years with this girl, and we both want to be in eachothers lives. I got flustered when she didn't text me back, so I stopped texting back right away, usually 10 or 15 minutes or more if I'm busy. Dear god does that change the way things go. She's more responsive than ever before and I feel like I'm in control. I don't even care about the wait anymore, its natural now. Today we planned to get coffee. All day I was busy and barely paid attention to any of her texts or anything else for that matter. Then the time got closer. 15 Minutes prior and my heart and stomach were churning. I began looking over my shoulder everytime the door openned; I was already in the cafe, working on some Italian. I pretty much got extremely anxtious (forgive me if spelt wrong). She ended up cancelling, which I instantly didn't care about, because I had things to do, so what if she cancels. But the unsettling thing is the sheer power she had just from being expected. I was nervous. I've never been that nervous in my life. So what do I do for the next time we are supposed to meet up? If that is a sign of the feelings to come when she's actually infront of me, I have no clue how to handle it. Its beyond "giving a fuck". Any thoughts?