I'm not an expert at seduction in any respect, but I am quite aware of human behavior and human interaction, and I've been honing my skills over the past year or so. To me, there's two schools of thought in seduction - go out, be "confident", "sarge", dress well, work out, use tricks on women, have lots of sex OR be self aware, work on yourself, be confident, be open, integrate compassion and communication into your "game", and find success.

If you want to go out and have one night stands, the first option is great. The only thing is, I think in most cases just going out and playing the numbers game and actually talking to women gets you 90% of the way, even if you aren't wearing nice clothes, or you aren't in great shape. But from what I know about this option, it doesn't facilitate long lasting, meaningful connections with other people, and that is what you want if you want a truly fulfilling life.

People can argue that going out and fucking hot chicks is fulfilling, being Dan Bilzerian or whatever, but I have to imagine that Dan Bilzerian is out of touch with himself, and not really fulfilled as a person. I think his lavish lifestyle of fucking models and shooting guns is a distraction, and if it was ever to stop, the bottom would fall out.

Mark Manson's approach gives you the ability to know yourself, and connect with other people so that you can be happy in yourself, and happy with the people you surround yourself with. I'll give a great example from recently. I met a girl at a wedding a few weeks ago, got her number, and we started going out. We hooked up on the first date, slept together on the second date, and then she got quiet. I sent her a text to see if she wanted to get together, and she responded that she was having reservations about us, didn't feel fulfilled after our sexual encounter, and felt we moved too fast.

Now, if you go with the first school of thought, this would most likely result in a "PEACE OUT" response, and moving on to the next girl. Because "there's so many girls out there", right? Yeah, there are, but how quality are all those girls for anything more than sex? My approach was to respond, tell her that talking over text probably wasn't the best solution here, and asking her to get together and talk. I went over to her place, we talked, she opened up, I communicated my feelings and perspective, and everything worked out.

You see, she had been engaged and called off the wedding earlier this summer. I was the first person she dated, the first person she slept with, and she had a lot of unresolved issues that she was dealing with. She wants to date, she wants to have sex, but she's feeling a whole range of emotions. In talking through them, assuring her what I'm feeling, REASSURING her based on what her concerns are, we've established a bond now which will most likely lead to something positive in the future - including (if we have sex again) better sex, because she feels more comfortable and more connected.

Now, you need to think and respond in these situations based on the context and what you want. If you just want to fuck, then yes, maybe saying "Best of luck" is a good idea. But you have no idea what the future will bring, not only from her personally, but who she can connect you to, or what she can offer. Maybe you don't fuck anymore, but she remembers how you treated her, and introduces you to her awesome friend. Burning bridges doesn't get you anywhere.

Anyways, not everyone is ready for this kind of behavior, simply because it takes poise, maturity, and a lot of self reflection, but I can say from personal experience, it's substantially more fulfilling than just hooking up with random people. You feel better, you have better relationships with yourself and with women, and your life just becomes more fun and meaningful.

Anyways, this was kind of spurned from the post someone made earlier about feeling frustrated about just going out with random girls all the time and not finding anything worth pursuing. You don't have to live like that, there are better solutions.