How important are common interests?

recyclablebantha · 2015-07-30T03:40:54+00:00

How important are common interests?

Not very important. At least not in the way people think.

It always seems like I don't have a lot to talk about with women on dates. I'm not into the things most people are into.

So what? Conversations have little to do with you talking about the things you're interested in. Conversation isn't about dumping information on a person. It's about listening and getting the girl to talk. It's about connection. It's about getting her to open up about her emotions and motivations about whatever subject you're talking about.

I like PC gaming like Dota 2 and I watch anime and shows on adult swim.

Not relevant. Though I will say that anime with English dubbing, is usually lame. :P

I also am pretty busy these days so it's hard to try starting up new hobbies.

Not relevant.

IWBTTM · 2015-07-30T08:49:23+00:00

A little bit, it's good to have one common interest to get things started. But people change, and interests change a lot. And it's also very good to keep separate interests, well in my case anyway, I like to have a lot of alone time.

But you seem to tie common interests with conversation. As I said, it's good to have at least one common interest to have an easy ice breaker and something to talk about. Do you only talk of Dota 2 and anime to everyone you know? Do you never comment on food, something that happened in the news, how that guy's clothes over there look cool, what you're planning to do next year, how disappointing that latest movie was...? That's basic conversation. Next, just make them talk, about themselves. Everybody loves to talk about themselves. Ask her if she was a goody-two-shoes at school or a rebellious kid, then from there there are so many possibilities such as giving her an example of something really bad you did at school and asking her what is the worse she did. Exchanging stories. If the conversation dries up, ask another question on another topic, but don't go bombarding her with questions in all directions.

Last point, if conversation is not your strongest point, just do activity focused dates, such as bowling. A face to face coffee can be daunting, but the thing is sometimes it's also the fault of the woman, most of them are simply terrible at holding a conversation, especially if they are very pretty ;)

greatestaccounteva · 2015-07-30T00:52:04+00:00

Relationships
Pets
Working out
Music (especially concerts)
Books
Movies

Do you not do or like any of those?

Title	How important are common interests?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	0
Comments	7
Date	July 30, 2015 12:12 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3f3jmz/how_important_are_common_interests/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-important-are-common-interests.1391784 https://theredarchive.com/post/1391784

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