I'll try to be brief. Went to a buddies yesterday, he seems to have a way with women, is pretty natural when it comes to conversation, and knows that I am still struggling to get back into the game when it comes to meeting women and being social in general. He is often telling me that he can help. So we had a few beers at his place, stopped at a friends, then decided to try out the new sports/game bar in town. (small town 10,000peeps) I wasn't expecting to meet anyone and was really just in it to have a good time.

As we were approaching we both noticed the sign that says "ladies night". My initial reaction was then why are we going here?(first part of my mindset that needs to be fixed) He quickly points out that this is a good thing, and I immediately recognize my error of thought.

Now I work early so I'm normally in bed early, so it's only about 7p.m. There is a large crowd of women in similar attire, neon colors, presumably a bar team of sorts, I immediately know that I cannot approach that many women without floundering and falling silent. On the other side of the bar are two very attractive women who I initially believe to be out of my league,(poor mindset again) but that's fine because I'm out to have a good time, check out this new establishment, and play some shuffleboard pool and perhaps 2x4 jenga.

We get drinks and start talking with the bartender and another guy who is just hanging out, turns out he works there too. My friend and I decide to play shuffleboard, which would have been the perfect excuse to ask the 2 ladies to join us and play teams, but my buddy is scared of looking foolish because he has never played before, so I let that option slip through the cracks (another flaw in the mindset)

we play a game, and generally have a good time, all while getting harassed by the bartender and random guy for not scoring many points. (if you keep score in your head you can play multiple games, if you keep score on the machine it turns off at 15pts) Once our game is over, I'm beginning to regret passing on the easy opening to talk with the girls, and the most dreadful thing happens, they up and leave.

Again, i'm out for fun, but i know I pass on too many chances, and I can see myself thinking about this mistake for days to come. So we re-up on beers and I use the bathroom, but as I'm coming out the two lovelies walk right past and b-line it for their spot at the bar.

I walked up to my buddy, who is now completely engrossed in a conversation with the two dudes in the bar, and I realize that he is going to be very little help in opening a conversation, it's all on me and the world comes crashing in. How do i do this, why is my mind blank, why is my stomach churning, and why the fuck are my feet moving me in their direction. Please let some words come out of my mouth when I get to them, brain don't leave me for dead, start working and fast.

Now I like to believe that I only felt nervous, and that is wasn't visible from an outside vantage point, but I think they smelt the fear on me. I walked over pulled out a bar stool and slid myself in. I introduced myself and I told them that my friend and I could definitely use partners for the next game of shuffleboard.

They quickly introduced themselves, but were both on the fence as they had never played before. So I tried to ease their worries with some small talk, luckily the one I sat next too had a ginormous purse, so I made a joke about that and how it's probably throwing off her back alignment. I made a joke about how if I was at work I would have to put special over 70 tape on it and warn everyone about how heavy it was. (another flaw in my mindset, I seem to get sucked into conversations about work, when I would rather talk about fun) I we talked work for a while and I realized I was doing it and made it a point to say lets not talk about work, to which they pointed out I started it. I guided the talk to what we do for fun, which went well.

Now my buddy drags me away for some jenga, (this is when I should have tried for a number, but I seldom think that way, honestly i don't fear rejection at this stage so much, but I never think to go for the number, I believe it is because I spent a decade in a relationship where getting a girls number would have been the same as cheating, need to fix that train of thought) Now me and my buddy (who i kept expecting to sort of act as a wing while I was talking but just left me to them) are playing Jenga and I get the "hug a stranger" piece so I can go back for a minute or two, but they are both on their phones, but thats not stopping me. I walk over get the attention of the girl who i felt was actually interested in me, show her the piece and nod. She immediately complies. (again probably should have tried for a number)

Back at Jenga I start asking my buddy where he was while the 30minute conversation was going on. (i'm actually pretty proud that I hung in there that long, and there were only a few lulls that I think I handled well, calmly looking around not trying to force conversation) He kinda says sorry, and tells me that the girl who I thought liked me, was married and not ever going to cheat. I'm not interested in married or cheaters, but I realized I never once looked for rings, or tried to figure out relationship status, thought the other was cuter, but less interested in me.(mindset)

Now here is where I really went wrong. We went out for a smoke, I don't but he does, should have let him go alone, but I realize that I have like 2 dollars left from my meager going out fund, feeling super tired and a little too buzzed, and I cant think of anyway to stay in the bar without looking/feeling like a creeper. Thinking maybe I'll burrow enough for another drink, then approach the ladies at the bar again. We run into some mutual friends and get wrapped in some talks. After 45minutes outside I just don't feel it anymore so I hop on my bike and petal home knowing I have work in about 5hours. I don't know why I gave up, it was the best interaction i've had in a long time, maybe i didn't want to ruin it, but I think my brain might just be broken.

TL;DR Went out, chatted up some girls, had fun, forgot to try for a number, mad other rookie mistakes, but had fun..