Is it realistic to strive for not seeking validation at all, ever? To come from a place where you validate yourself totally?

roadmaptonowhere · 2015-11-16T23:30:52+00:00

It all comes down to core confidence. Know yourself, know your strengths, admit your weaknesses. If you seek validation it means that you have no self belief: you need other people to tell you you're enough. Not perfect, but enough. Here one drill you can try: when you are with a girl try to look bad, make a fool of yourself, tell her your awkward stories. It will prove to you and your brain that you don't need her validation. "Stop trying to be perfect. Let the chips fall where they may." Fight Club

Akoraz · 2015-11-17T03:53:47+00:00

I believe that for the most part, you can get solely inner validation if you really tried. But in return, you'll possibly accidentally get outside validation.

One thing I learned from pickup is to "Date and fall in love with yourself, first. Then women are easy."

tramplemestilsken · 2015-11-17T16:22:24+00:00

2 things.

Read The Gift of Imperfection or Daring Greatly by Brene Brown.
Just know that there's a difference between sharing things about yourself that are positive, and sharing things about yourself that seek validation. It's ok to tell people relatable things you've done that are also cool and interesting. Just don't over indulge. "Oh yeah? I've spent some time doing x". Then leave it up to them if they want to ask more, if not, keep the focus on them. Share to relate, not to one up.

Title	Is it realistic to strive for not seeking validation at all, ever? To come from a place where you validate yourself totally?
Author	bertrand-
Upvotes	4
Comments	3
Date	November 16, 2015 11:04 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3t2yot/is_it_realistic_to_strive_for_not_seeking/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/is-it-realistic-to-strive-for-not-seeking.1397723 https://theredarchive.com/post/1397723

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