If I'm running out of things to say, what's are some of your ways of fixing that?

BrettEllisDotNet · 2016-06-08T06:00:53+00:00

A while ago I learned about being able to talk forever. It was an exercise called "Conversational Chunking". Basically it goes like this example:

You start talking about a Brand of a car - Lets say a tesla. You can get more specific and talk about how it works (this is chunking DOWN) or you can go UP and talk about cars in general. You can then go UP another chunk and talk about transportation in general and then chunk down and across onto other modes of transportation (Bikes, trains, Aircraft etc.) Then you can chunk down further into deeper details again.

Now, it's important to note than men will generally talk about X, then finish talking about X completely until moving on to talk about Y.

Women, on the other hand, will talk about X a bit, then jump to A, then over to Y before talking about a bit more of X (in the space of 3 minutes).

So what you can do is talk about something for a little bit, chunk UP and talk about the bigger picture, then jump over to something that is slightly related and chunk down.

Example in the context of dating:

"So that's so cool that you're a Lawyer - What made you get into it" (Chunking up) She talks about her bigger picture. You can also ask her what a normal day looks like (Chunk down). You can then move subjects by saying something like "I knew someone who was a laywer, and he had had clients all over the country so he travelled alot - Have you done much travel?"

Now you talk about travel - You can chunk down and go specific on places, or events, or you can go up and talk about broader subjects on travel.

It takes practice, is not all that linear (but Girls don't seem to mind jumping all over the place).

I hope I made sense. It's difficult to really convey this over text (I practice this with people in seminars) but you should get the idea.

mancozbi · 2016-06-07T18:59:41+00:00

Ask her questions about herself. Fun stuff, you don't want to sound like the FBI. What do/did you study? Do you work? What's a really good or bad date for you? How do you exercise? What's your favourite cloths shop? Make it about her.

TroubleWithTheCurve · 2016-06-08T01:42:30+00:00

A trick from improv:

Stop what you're doing. Look directly into her eyes and ask yourself, "Why do I care about this person?" Proceed.

Title	If I'm running out of things to say, what's are some of your ways of fixing that?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	5
Comments	4
Date	June 7, 2016 6:47 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/4n0m8e/if_im_running_out_of_things_to_say_whats_are_some/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/if-im-running-out-of-things-to-say-whats-are-some.1407840 https://theredarchive.com/post/1407840

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