Time spent: 1 hour + 1 hour wing-meetup before session

Total sets: 8 (3 warmups + 5 sets)

 

I’ve now been out 7 DAYS IN A ROW, plus going out several times a couple weeks before that even! This is just huge fucking progress in itself for me.

 

WARMUP

 

Solo warmup: Lady with fur-jacket

Sticking points

  • Speaking too low and too fast
  • Creating more comfort with the girl so they’ll stay longer to talk, not be creeped/freaked out, feeling too much pressure
  • Persistence - Pushing it further, even when she says “I have to go”, “I have a boyfriend”, or walks away - Don’t eject too early
  • Being more aware of her, and being at ease with myself however I feel

References

  • I’m an awesome guy with balls that dares to approach an attractive woman in the day out in public, and I don’t care about people watching or hearing me, I take right action for myself
  • Women like getting compliments out and about in the day
  • I can do right action even tho I feel like shit, anxious, down
  • Nobody around cares, if they do, it doesn’t matter to me

 

I then meet-up with my wing and we wait for the other’s, he was hosting a local meetup in our town. We talked about our stories with each other, it’s nice sharing and listening to their perspectives and challenges, we find out we’re quite similiar but also very much different in this personal journey.

 

Warmup; blonde in black and leather jacket

My wing pushed me unto this, it’s normal for him to push me to start, I don’t mind it too much being the one the set the “momentum-standard”. But I should probably be the one who’s pushing myself to start. Usual opener: “Excuse me? I must say something kinda direct. You look very nice today.” - What I found is it’s starts of very chode-ish; too fast talking, trying for rapport - I think just being more aware and present will help this, also just keeping the macro-momentum up has been huge to progression. She asked me if this was a dare, and I teased her a bit: “you don’t want this do be a dare do ya?” - then I said it actually was a dare (being real), then I pointed at my friends.

Good:

  • Acknowledging and embracing I’m out with friends, cause I usually find it to be awkward if they “found out"
  • Starting off the session with 3 other wings, by being the one to take action first

Improve:

  • Be more dominant and leading - ie. When they say bye, it’s “over” usually
  • Didn’t know her logistics, but I should’ve, then pushed for a bit longer interaction - Even tho I don’t find the girl THAT attractive, I’m still practicing becoming good at sparking attraction, creating good comfort, vibe, leading, self-amusing, story-telling - you know it ;)

 

Warmup: 2-set cute blondie girls

We were doing our warmup so I don’t think I should think too much about pushing, or maybe I should, I’m not sure.. Anyway, it was just a compliment, and have a nice day too both of you! I knew I was just going to give them a compliment so I felt more assure and gave myself permission to be more assertive and dominant - This being showed in my more confident stop-opening, my voice was more relaxed and slow and flowy.

Improve:

  • Don’t have an agenda, no outcome, putting you more at ease with having random fun with people

 

With this local meetup I met a new wing, and he was quite smooth, looked cool and relaxed, and I liked his style. He held up a 6-set of cute girls (young tho) and you could tell he had them all, they were all having their attention at him, listening. This just made me think of myself wanting to have a lot more of that attitude in set - “it’s no big deal, I’m cool, I’m chill, I know what I want, I don’t need any of you, etc..” - He said his criteria for success is just going up and saying “hi” - it’s still a good day, if not even better. I used this mental “trick” before and it works quite well, gonna try and keep it in mind infield - instead of stressing about future projections of whatever, which I do a lot - NOT helping - BE in the moment, really!

 

THEM SETS

 

White pants girl

She walked passed me and my wing, and he instigated me to open her, I ran probably 30m to get to her. Usual excuse me + compliment open. She’s the 2th one today asking if this is a prank/dare, I then kinda used the same thing I said to the one earlier - “I can say I was pushed to it, but I chose you.” - I then asked for her name, her respond was silence. “Okay, we haven’t maybe gone that personal yet, hehe..” - Her: “Can you leave?” - Like, with an undertone of being scared/creeped out. I must say, this fucking hurt… Yesterday was probably the first “can you leave?” I got. I don’t know what to say after my opener, I totally forgot about my “I see/think/feel..” thing I was gonna try out for follow-ups. I compliment them on their outfit and shit, which I often don’t give two shits about.

Good:

  • I don’t like speeding up/running to get to the girl, so I fucking did it!
  • Being relatively calm and positive after this “incident”, keeping up good vibes with wings

Improve:

  • Look at rejections as lessons, and in the moment, something funny that happened
  • Find something more genuine within you that you can state, instead of giving out empty fake compliments about their clothing of which you don’t care
  • Try and keep your vibe from with your wings to when you chat with girls, don’t put up a front

References:

  • It’s okay with getting “rejected”, and also occasionally creeping out some, it’s a filter, a process, and I learnt that it doesn’t fucking matter at all, it’s actually kinda funny, AND I get emotionally stronger

 

Swedish woman

It’s interesting how they look way more beautiful to me, before I’ve talked to them. Right after I open, they “step down” the scale of how hot and beautiful they are. I think this is my mind glorifying women to these godesses, and when I actually talk with them, it’s like they become more real and human to me, because they are, just like myself. I held her hand like elegant, and then I even switched hands and begun swinging it slowly as we were talking, she didn’t mind and it made the interaction more fun and attractive. I feel more easy about flirting with women I don’t find intimidately pretty, like I really believe it doesn’t matter if she likes me or not, I’ll be just fine. How can I think and be like this with girls I do find attractive? We chat a bit, I make her feel good, laugh, and blush. It ended with her asking me if im doing pickup, I say yeah, embraicing it, then said I wasn’t alone and tried to find me friends but couldnt, hehe.. (maybe she didn’t believe me, I’d imagine it came off as qualifying anyway.)

Good:

  • Ran across the street to meet her
  • My open sounded good, calm, real and confident - with flow (I think I sound to choppy)
  • TRIED to be sexually teasing: “Isn’t that a little cold?” pointing out her cleavage - It just sounded friendly and casual (maybe a good thing, I dunno..)
  • Again tried to be sexual teasing: “I shouldn’t say what I think.. That would maybe be.. A little too fast.” (YES YOU SHOULD SAY) - I was thinking that her cleavage/boobs was fucking sexy
  • Good assertiveness and leading, “introduce yourself then."
  • Embracing being out and picking up women: “so you’re running around doing pickup?” - “Yeah, I talk to the prettiest ones I find.” - Listening to this audio, she fucking cracked up blushing, which I wasn’t didn’t fully realize in-field ("anxiety-override” mostly, gotten a lot better tho)

Improve:

  • Slow down your speaking speed bro, relax more
  • I should’ve been the first to speak after our name-exchange, pointing out her heavy swedish accent
  • End at YOUR terms, not on their quick impulse goodbye.

References:

  • Being more yourself, talking like you’re at ease (being it is best) makes good vibe
  • Women like being told (direct or indirectly) that they're fucking attractive/sexy by a cool dude

 

Brunette with dark blue outfit and red scarf

Good:

  • Short amount of time from last set, almost the first “next girl” I saw
  • Kept the conversation going with good flow, leading it, introducing myself
  • Story-telling about my slow morning - I usually don’t “get to” share much about myself

Improve:

  • Spark more attraction with flirting spikes her and there, you’re cool and funny, use it!
  • Build more comfort, she has to get comfortable speaking to you, go from stranger to familiar
  • Bring more value, be more fun, tease, joke, challenge her, poke at her
  • Find out her logistics, I only found out she was on her way home from work
    • which could EASILY be a green light for an instant-date; find out where she lives and suggest taking a quick walk (towards her place), or a quick coffee somewhere near.
  • Don’t give up so easily - their “But, I have to go now” is just them instinctly saying I don’t know you well enough, and you haven’t showed me yet how cool/fun you are, so I feel the need to say this in this small “awkward” silence.

References and lessons:

  • Own it, you’re cool, be proud of doing this, show it with your body, with your voice - She liked it. I can be confident and more myself if I let me, and it’s all good!
  • Once again, women enjoy having a chat with random cool dudes stating their intent, which is me ;)

 

Cute small brunette with fur-coat

I as usual tease the girls with the furry coats, asking if she killed it herself. It was a good vibe and conversation, but maybe too friendly. She had a boyfriend tho. It’s awesome I opened her because I talked to another girl right before, and as I was walking back to my wings I spotted this one in the middle, so I decided to just go for it. I stroke her fur coat and playfully said I had to. I had good momentum from the last set, just seconds ago, so my response to their “on my way home from work” came out way more smooth and "natural".

Good:

  • Kept calm having to repeat my opener (mumbling), then said confidentally “I dig you jacket.”
  • Stroked her furry jacket on her arm, I referenced a commercial where some guy HAS to touch this furry hat of some stranger, she didn’t get my reference so I said I didn’t watch much TV myself. I then caught myself qualifying, and called me out on it: “I just said that trying to impress you”, which she liked and laughed.
  • Teased her playfully with her working in a purse-shop then not having one herself, and for maybe having a lot of hidden pockets in her big fur-jacket
  • Her name was Jasmine, so I said I could be Aladdin (internal joke: ’twas my wing’s costume for halloween, lol) - she said she already had an Aladdin, then I said I could be little Abu.
  • Ended on MY terms after finding out she had a boyfriend, saying nice to talk with you

Improve:

  • I couldve said that no, I WAS Aladdin, her boyfriend could be Abu, making us breakfast
  • It was good in this set, but in general, have more awareness of how the girl is feeling, then calibrate!

References:

  • Women, even with boyfriends, love being hit on by awesome dudes in the day/evening/whatever

 

We then watch one of our wings actually PULL a girl for the first time, instead of actually just “hanging in there” - this was inspirational and def made it more real and possible for the rest of us! Also seeing wings go with girls in shops/malls is cool, cause it’s not quite within MY reality, which is bullshit, it’s totally legit and very okay to do.

 

Very young girl, appearing more old I opened a girl, gave her compliment, then asked if she was stressed out, “yeah, I’m meeting with friends.” - I then find out she's 15, damn, haha! I thought she was 20 or over, my age-radar has gotten really off the last years, but I don’t care.. No excuses.

Good:

  • Good awareness seeing she was rushing and kinda stressed, pointing it out to her

References:

  • It’s good to just be flowing and say whatever comes to mind (which was spotting her stressed)
  • It doesn’t really matter if they look “too young”, they can me much older/younger than that initial visual-impression, you never know before you ask, so I don’t use that as an excuse

 

Lesson from wing’s “mistake”: He said he spotted someone much much more attractive than the ones he opened, we know from watching Julien that this is possible to just switch right to those girls you like, he should’ve done it, and it would be interesting to do it myself when I meet that opportunity, and prove that it’s possible even in the daytime.

 

As usual when we split I wanna do at least one more solo, but didn’t muster up the courage to, this must change - solo is the ideal here for me.

 

OVERALL

 

Good:

  • Being fun and light mood with wings
  • Being quite active doing sets, pushing eachother

References:

  • Girls love this, getting compliments from an awesome guy like me

Improve:

  • Be more chill and at ease with yourself - project a calm and cool tonality (more neutral and breaking rapport tone)
  • Build more comfort with girls, by being more aware of their feeling/body language
  • Be more flirty, do some more stacking at the beginning, fun
  • Find out logistics fast - find out if they have time for instant-date and/or a pull to them

 

FOCUS FOR NEXT TIME:

  • Meditate in-set, feel your deep breathing (meditate at home more also)
  • Follow-up in mind, just: “I think/see/feel … "