Seddit, What am I doing wrong? I've been rated between 6-8 on Rate Me but can't seem to get a girlfriend or get laid. Admittedly I'm not the best with flirting but I wanna improve with women. I'm only 5'7" and around 125lbs. Is that part of the issue? Should I gain muscle?

425Marine · 2017-01-07T06:36:55+00:00

Do you have a core group of friends? Do you guys go out often? Gaining muscle might get you some glances but the type of energy and vibe you give off is huge from my experience. Confidence is my biggest tool because I think sometimes ladies subconsciously want to know where this comes from. I was gonna text more but I'm drinking and suddenly got bored. Good luck. Hopefully some of this struck a cord.

mcr00sterdota · 2017-01-07T08:09:44+00:00

You should lift, but only to improve yourself. As a result of improving yourself, you will become more attractive to women.

Nerian99 · 2017-01-07T08:00:29+00:00

Definitely lift. There's no excuses other than laziness. It's not everything but it's a benefit. I would just tell you to dive into the seduction community and learn the basics. You don't need specialized advice.

Bearfost43 · 2017-01-07T06:18:09+00:00

maybe its just that your game sucks and need practice, you could start by reading the sidebar for the basics and approach girls

DariusSSfJ · 2017-01-07T08:19:49+00:00

I've read and re-read your post but what I'm not seeing is what you're doing to meet women, to put yourself out there and where it goes wrong?

Its hard to give you any practical advice without this.

Looking into your rateme photos, there are some things to improve:

-With heart shaped face, you'd be better off with a haircut that's longer on the top, while keeping the sides short. This will also add some perceived height. Facial hair, short or full beard, would also look good on you as it would add volume to your narrow jawline, assuming you are able to grow it out (if not, don't worry about it). -Yes, adding some muscle to your frame is always a good idea if you're skinny. -It's hard to evaluate your style, though the outfit in the first photo is pretty damn awful for seduction. Unless you're meeting women in the gym, rocking athletic wear for meeting women is like shooting yourself in the foot.

But overall, you're a quite good looking guy.

2017-01-07T09:13:38+00:00

Knowing how to talk to a woman is vital. Looks only get your foot in the door. You should work on that.

urbanwizz · 2017-01-07T18:30:02+00:00

I don't mean to be rude but your weight is pretty close to or less than the weight of most women. Changing that is a good start, but don't wait until you're buff to believe you're attractive. Be confident now- fake it until you make it.

nbrrii · 2017-01-07T12:14:10+00:00

There are some common things that might be the main problem.

As some ppl has already given you advise to change hairstyle and clothing there are chances that these are strongly sub-standard. It happens that a man has one or two traits (character, looks, communication,...) that are a huge disadvantage, very well visible in general, but not seen by the person affected. So take a very good look at yourself and/or get very honest or even cruel feedback from somebody.

Might also be that you have high standards that stops you from being even interested in most girls. This is absolutely fine, but game/effort/looks/... should address this.

At last, often overseen is the statistical point of view. As most ppl get a girlfriend out of their social environment, fitting women is not a 'infinite ressource', so to speak. You might just have been unlucky so far or only need to get to known some new ppl, getting new hobby, for example. This depends on your age, if you are below 25 chances are good, that your surrounding will change 2 or 3 times in the next years, creating a lot of opportunities to find a girlfriend.

If you are more interested in the 'pickup' way doing cold/warm approaches, take the above hints that everything is fine with you and you might only need a new haircut and/or some flirt practice.

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