I'm going to a club and pub for the first time, what to do?

t1mman · 2017-02-24T16:09:31+00:00

have fun, don't take all of this too seriously, life is meant to experiment, have fun, and exchange.

There's a tendency to try to be the "center event" in those things, and some people are good at it, but we rarely connect much with the "storyteller", he has his audience, we are part of it, he entertain us and that's fun!

Most people connect trough rapport, and with the ones that can listen to us, have an interest in "who we are", the one we can share with and we have a feeling he is sharing as well. The "art of conversation" is mostly listening and being curious about the other instead of "waiting for our time to talk".

For a club, where you dance, same things apply; don't take all of this too seriously. Most people don't care how you dance, if you can "break a move" or anything. Enjoy yourself, have fun dancing and be in the moment. That's about it!

Did I say "have fun"?

urbangentlman · 2017-02-24T16:40:51+00:00

Don't try to be the life of the party. you're new. sit back, observe and comment when you really feel you have something worthy to contribute. don't seek validation from them, just be there. Also, don't 1 up anyone or anything in an effort to gain acceptance. Be calm, confident, laugh at their jokes, introduce yourself first and maybe buy a round.

1z1z2x2x3c3c4v4v · 2017-02-24T18:44:36+00:00

Ask people about themselves. People love to talk about their interests and hobbies.

From "How to Win Friends and Influence People"

Six Ways to Make People Like You

Become genuinely interested in other people. "You can make more friends in two months by being interested in them, than in two years by making them interested in you."The only way to make quality, lasting friendships is to learn to be genuinely interested in them and their interests.

Smile. Happiness does not depend on outside circumstances, but rather on inward attitudes. Smiles are free to give and have an amazing ability to make others feel wonderful. Smile in everything that you do.

Remember that a person's name is, to that person, the sweetest and most important sound in any language. "The average person is more interested in their own name than in all the other names in the world put together." People love their names so much that they will often donate large amounts of money just to have a building named after themselves. We can make people feel extremely valued and important by remembering their name.

Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves. The easiest way to become a good conversationalist is to become a good listener. To be a good listener, we must actually care about what people have to say. Many times people don't want an entertaining conversation partner; they just want someone who will listen to them.

Talk in terms of the other person's interest. The royal road to a person's heart is to talk about the things he or she treasures most. If we talk to people about what they are interested in, they will feel valued and value us in return.

Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely. The golden rule is to treat other people how we would like to be treated. We love to feel important and so does everyone else. People will talk to us for hours if we allow them to talk about themselves. If we can make people feel important in a sincere and appreciative way, then we will win all the friends we could ever dream of.

recyclablebanthas · 2017-02-24T19:14:28+00:00

Going with a friend and his group of friends whom I do not know at all.

So you'll have plenty to talk about.

How do I become more 'fun'

You don't need to be fun. You need to find ways to enjoy yourself. There's a difference.

.....and socialize with them?

You talk to them, with an eye towards facilitating them talking and getting them to open up.

2017-02-24T20:42:33+00:00

I don't think you have to do anything. Call it a reconnaissance mission. Just pretend you are in your living room with a few friends. You will do fine.

Radicalmattitude1 · 2017-02-24T21:08:39+00:00

The most common complaint I hear from guys who don't go to bars or clubs is " It's too loud. I can't have a conversation with anyone"

Don't let the loud hectic environment discourage you. Communicate with your body. It's ok to lean in close and yell in someones ear if you have to.

I would just check the place out. Introduce yourself to people. Relax and breath . Smile, laugh and have fun!! Don't take it too seriously. People are there to let loose and just have a good time so don't be afraid to get silly. There are no rules

iskip123 · 2017-02-24T23:17:07+00:00

Feed conversation listen ask questions and be attentive. Stop worrying about it. Find subjects they like and talk about them easiest thing honestly then u don't even have to talk!

2017-02-24T17:08:01+00:00

Get locked and do shots.

Title	I'm going to a club and pub for the first time, what to do?
Author	holamigos666
Upvotes	18
Comments	8
Date	February 24, 2017 2:30 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/5vxqb0/im_going_to_a_club_and_pub_for_the_first_time/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/im-going-to-a-club-and-pub-for-the-first-time-what.1420771 https://theredarchive.com/post/1420771

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