So I've been traveling for the past few months, and this has been coming up a lot for me - can you actually create chemistry, or does it just happen? I feel like I meet girls, and sometimes there's chemistry and I just run with it and it clicks and something comes of it. Other times, there isn't, and if I don't feel anything with the other person, nothing comes of it. What I don't understand is, is it even possible to create chemistry with someone? Like I met a girl today at a hostel I'm staying at, and I thought she was attractive. I mentioned I went to Burning Man last year, and she perked up and started talking to me. We chatted for a while, then I went to go out. When I came back, I ran into her again, and we started talking (she's heading back to the states in the AM). We went out to dinner, talked all evening, but it just never felt like there was anything there, even though I was physically attracted to her and I would have been into hooking up with her.

What I don't understand is, is there anything I could have even done? She has been traveling for 10 days, she's leaving tomorrow, getting over being sick. We're in a hostel with a bunch of other people, and we have spend a few hours together before she has to leave. In her mind, maybe she's thinking she doesn't want to start anything, maybe we need a bit of time to jive, maybe she's feeling out of it from being sick and partying in Berlin last week, or maybe she's just not feeling it. On the other hand, I met a girl in Seville a few months ago, and I didn't do anything and I ended up fingering her in the park a few hours later. I could FEEL it with her, and it was so easy, I didn't even have to try. In London a few weeks later, I went out with a girl, and again, it just clicked.

So again, if I see a girl, and I'm attracted to her, and I talk to her, do I REALLY have control to get her to be into me, or is it just a timing/situational/ifshesattracted to me situation? This is what I'm really trying to understand, because I feel like a lot of the suggestions on here I just do naturally, but most of the time I just feel completely out of control in getting a girl to be into me.