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[–]rareinstance 5 points6 points7 points 8 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
Well here’s my honest observation. She is not playing the game. You are.
She was explicit in her wants and seek clarification on yours. Straight off that bat, I read your response as negging - playing games, non committal, there for the fun but without the responsibility.
The fact that she pulls back, she appears to me as someone who knows her boundaries and wants well. A solid character these days.
Edit: add response to question
Moving forward, I’d say it’s time for candor. If you are into her, show that. Do not bullshit to placate if you are not on the same page. Readdress her previous question by saying you have given it more thought - only if you truly feel that way.
That’s my honest two cents :)
Good luck!
[–]AruSharma04 2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Very sound advice. You have my upvote good sir.
[–]nat-han92 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Wise advice. She is definitely a high value woman, and an incredible catch. She is a solid 9/10 and she knows it.
I am realizing I have to ask her out, but Im afraid I have already lost her interest. What could I do and what would be a good date idea at this point?
[–]rareinstance 2 points3 points4 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Totally understand how you are feeling. It’s hard to be objective about what to do when we are feeling vulnerable. We have varying coping mechanisms when it comes to feeling that way - typically suppress or deal.
Think about it this way, she allow herself to express her vulnerability by making the move to ask about your position on the type of women you like and if you are in the mindset of a relationship. That takes courage. No matter how confident someone is, matters of desire and the heart always involve vulnerability. She rise to the occasion. It’s your turn now.
If I’m in your shoes, I’ll send her a text saying along the lines of -
I’ve noticed there has been a decline in our interaction and I suspect our previous discussion may have been a contributing factor. If I’m wrong, please do correct me. Having said that, I have given more thought on what we talked about and perhaps, I haven’t been as forthright as I should have. I’d like to share my thoughts about us with you if you are open to it. Are you free for dinner sometime this week?
Feel free to word it in your own way, deem most suitable based on your language with her.
Hope that helps.
[–]nat-han92 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sound advice!!! This is the way to proceed, definitely.
It is also difficult for me, knowing that she is a high value woman that must have tons of guys interested in her and showing that intention. I dont want to ruin the rapport we have been building.
[–]cbh28 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
She wants a relationship now, while you don't seem like you want one. Why would she waste her time on someone who isn't ready for something serious? Maybe she's just trying to play it "cool" just like you, but I think she's just tired of wasting her time on you. 3 months, she tells you she wants something serious, you say no.... I'd probably move on too if I was her.
You’re right. I should have forseen this. I was trying to play it cool but I came across as TOO aloof.
Is there any way to turn this around?
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[–]rareinstance 5 points6 points7 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]AruSharma04 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]nat-han92 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]rareinstance 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]nat-han92 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]cbh28 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]nat-han92 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link