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goron24
[–]xposedprincess 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Ask her. Ain't no one on Reddit can tell you how she feels.
[–]goron24[S] 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I was thinking of that, but this all went down a couple weeks ago and the last 2 texts I sent her were ignored (just good morning stuff)
[–]xposedprincess 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Well I'd suggest at least sending her a text to ask what may have changed. She may have not felt any kind of "spark" and is avoiding conflict by not telling you. Or maybe she's dealing with a personal issue that has nothing to do with you.
[–]goron24[S] 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'm sure past experience with trying to explain probably got her described with some expletives. As much as it sucks she ghosted I have no hard feelings towards her, I enjoyed our time talking.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
POF is an awful app/site.
[–]mylittlethrowaway135 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
well first off, It's over. accept that. It's not fixable, and you don't want it to be. A person who ghost's you like that has to sort themselves out before they can be with someone else. Now if you want to try and find out why that's cool. I would just straight up ask her. treat it like an interview where you didn't get the job. Tell her you understand that obviously she isn't interested in continuing seeing you and that you accept that and don't intend on trying to change her mind but you would like to know why she decided to walk. If you get no response from that just drop it and move one. no sense in putting energy into something that won't give you anything back. Do a bit of self assesment. respectfully here is what I see. 1)Did you actually meet her IRL? My experience with POF has been that if you don't meet within a few days of the initial message it's a lost cause. the point of POF is not to have an online relationship and you need to transition off the internet ASAP. 2) Try to be more discerning. You only talked to her a few times. there is no way you can know that she was brilliant educated or motivated. you suspect those things which is a great start, don't make her into a person you want her to be, find out of she is the person you want to be with. This takes more than a few conversations. 3) you seem to be worried about weather or not you said something that offended her. I highly doubt you offended her. and you shouldn't care about this anyway. you should want someone who wants to be with you for who you are, if she was offended she doesn't meet that cirteria. (and you should want to be the ideal you as well...self improvement is important here). just an additianal point here. I'm not saying you should info dump on her all about you PUA methods apply obviously. but a controlled release of information can help (make her earn your trust). Anyway I hope that didn't come off as harsh (it wasn't intended that way anyway). Don't sweat it. and keep trying (with other people).
A person who ghost's you like that has to sort themselves out before they can be with someone else.
Fair assessment, it also shows incredibly poor communication skills and that at the first sign of a problem they bolt. I'm not about that life
The interview type message was how I was going to approach it if I did send a message. Just feedback to refine a process.
1) No, not that I wouldn't have (especially the night we stayed up late) but I was physically about 800km away for work until the day after she ghosted.
2) Well we did talk at length and time we talked. She had a masters degree and worked on military contracts. I work in engineering so we did talk a fair bit about intellectual subjects. However the point you make still applies, I didn't REALLY know her. I should clarify that we started talking May 8th (Ironically my birthday) and I got ghosted the 17th.
3) This is just because the last time we talked I joked about spending a week camping with her and her kiddo (we both have 1 child) and that's the only real part she could have misconstrued, other than our phone convo being awkward but we'd never met and had both been up until 1AM so whatever.
You definitely didn't come off harsh, i'm pretty good at taking criticism these days. You made some fair points for sure and at the end of the day she played her hand and showed how much she was willing to put into a relationship.
[–]Chuck_Norris_Jokebot 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You mentioned the word 'joke'. Here is one about Chuck Norris:
A man once taunted Chuck Norris with a bag of Lay's potato chips, saying "Betcha can't eat just one!" Chuck Norris proceeded to eat the chips, the bag, and the man in one deft move.
hahaha love it
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[–]xposedprincess 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]goron24[S] 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]xposedprincess 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]goron24[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]mylittlethrowaway135 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]goron24[S] 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Chuck_Norris_Jokebot 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]goron24[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link