How to approach a girl you've already gotten with before

Tesslah13 · 2018-10-19T15:31:47+00:00

Skip the coffee. Coffee dates are usually used to build comfort and to see if there's chemistry.

Invite her to go DO something, preferably something you would want to do even if you were by yourself. When you ask say something to the effect of "Hey I'm doing ___, you should tag along."

ivan_mcnasty · 2018-10-19T19:17:31+00:00

You may be interested in a concept called "activity building" that I learned several years ago.

Activity building is when you and a girl set out on a common objective together that has an outcome that strengthens your relationship.

conquering one of her fears
- e.g shes is scared of tigers, you take her to every zoo within a 50 mile radius over a course of dates
learning a new skill together
- e.g dancing, bartender classes, how to make clay pots, whatever
etc.

The actual activity doesn't matter, but it is best to not be a one time activity. Ideally you will want the activity to take weeks or months to accomplish...

I found this to be *ONE* of the keys for distinguishing a strictly sexual relationship from more of a monogamous/girlfriendy structure.

When there is a common activity between you and the girl, it brings purpose to you being together other than the sex. This makes the woman feel valued in a sense and not objectified, so she *MIGHT* then decide that time with you is worth leaving behind all that easily available dick she can get any second (she knows this, she isn't stupid. Probably. xD)

Just having sex does not count as activity building unfortunately, but this is often where you have to start.

So getting this girl to be your girlfriend simply begins with you spending time with her now any way you can...

Ask her out on a date, one that will ideally end in sex. You will probably want to shag on the first date because you don't want to spook her off by changing your patterns. If she feels you are coming on too boyfriendy, she will probably keep you at a distance if not ghost you.

You may wait to shag on the second date, but only recommended if she is giving you strong vibes and seems very interested.

From here, you will uncover her interests through pillow talk and figure out a non needy way to set forth on a marvelous activity with her.

But be warned, this is where men fall into girlfriend danger. If you complete the first activity and don't think of one to take it's place, she may start to get bored of the relationship and yearn once again for that readily available dick.

So get creative.

Hope this helped,

Ivan

RussianFakeNewsBot · 2018-10-19T16:24:05+00:00

I'd go for drinks but that's what I do for most first dates.

I am in the UK where first dates often tend to include drinking though.

WB2E · 2018-10-19T21:23:31+00:00

and to add, even if you're interested in more than a hookup, it should still be a hookup first to set your frame. Then from there it'll be easier to date her.

Title	How to approach a girl you've already gotten with before
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	6
Comments	11
Date	October 19, 2018 3:03 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/9pkn0h/how_to_approach_a_girl_youve_already_gotten_with/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-approach-a-girl-youve-already-gotten-with.1455267 https://theredarchive.com/post/1455267

Comments