Questions about compliments, exes

skorpion7777 · 2019-05-19T12:43:37+00:00

See it as a compliment. Maybe not directly as an IOI. Just say "Thanks" smile and continue with the interaction as if nothing happend.
Try to shut it down by making fun of her. Especially if she talks non stop about it. Don't validate her by saying shit like " your ex sounds terrible" don't ever do that. Call her out for seeming incapable of a lasting relationship in a obviously sarcastic way. Be fun about it.
Depends on the situation. If the topic matches and you exchange crazy stories about the past it can be a fun thing to tell and hidden validation. Just don't start telling such things out of nowhere and don't over emphasis it being your ex. Maybe don't even mention that and let her by subtle hints come to that conclusion by herself (e.g. that you lived together)
Hell no! Not only makes that easily project you being submissive but also that's a hot topic. Keep conversation light and fun on a date and far away from things like politics, feminism, laws and specific work related stuff

WIA20XX · 2019-05-19T16:03:51+00:00

What if the girl calls you nice or a gentleman or something similar, this isn't for a "Oh you are so nice but I already have a bf"

There isn't enough context to give you advice here. She could be honest and nice herself. She could be mocking you.

What if the girl talks about her ex or past boyfriend being a dick to them or being a douchebag or just plain simple lazy, do you double down on it or just listen in?

Pickup can be a bunch of preplanned responses, but this is also contextual.

Is it okay to tell her stories that involve my exes or girls being into me to establish abundance in the past?

This is generally tricky to do, because just like her telling you stories involving other guys, it can be off putting.

If you want to convey that other girls want you, it's better to interact with other girls in front of her. She is going to watch the body language and social cues of other women, and judge how attractive you really are based on their honest signals.

I do have a couple of really crazy stories that way. If I do it in a subtle way of it coming out rather than me wanting to tell them desperately, is it a good idea?

This is a style choice. If you want to be the guy that blabs incredible stories unprompted - you have to fully commit to being that kind of guy that has zero filter with anyone.

The typical guy that is learning pickup is a poker player.

Does it depend on the kind of girl? None of these stories involve me shitting on my exes but are just interesting stories.

It depends on a million things. Pickup is not for perfectionists.

I am quite open in my outlook for women to have equal rights and be treated with mutual respect (avoiding the trigger word feminist as it tends to polarize people). Should I let that side show to build trust in me?

It shouldn't come up in an approach is a first date.

Furthermore, trust in a seduction situation is not about having the same political, social, and cultural values.

Trust is more basic.

You are not going to physically hurt her. You're not going to embarrass her in public. If you have to hold her hand, you don't grab her, crush her palm, and get all lovey dovey.

How do you respond to compliments for them to actually work for you rather than just something which is a fact said about you?

There are infinite ways to respond to compliments.

Girl says, I like your hair.

Two regular replies -
- thanks.
- thanks and I like your hair too.

Both of these are the correct response as taught by society. Take a compliment, or take one and give one. Straight out of first grade. You'd be surprised how many guys don't know the socially approved responses.

However If you want to do pickup, in my view, you don't give her what she expects - because that makes you boring. She gets a stock answer, she will just go on autopilot, and there is no spark, no chemistry.

When I get the nice hair compliment, I am interested in what makes her notice my hair, and why she complimented it.

My overall mentality with chicks is the whatever they say or do - the action is the tip of the iceberg for her personality and behavior.

Girl - Nice hair.

Archie - (in the tone of surprise) Really?

Archie - That's what you notice about me?

She's expecting me to just take a compliment, but I'm turning something she said about me, and creating more options of where the chat can go.

I could take her hand and put it in my hair.
I could say, I didn't take you for a hair person.
I could pretend to be hurt and say, "Not my Ears?"
I could suggest something without saying it "Oh, that's what you like" with my tone of voice suggesting that she just sexualized me.

Etc.

When you watch a couple flirt or see really good movies/television/plays - the real communication is rarely in the verbal content. It is in the subcommunication.

In writing this is hard to convey. You can emphasize one word in a sentence and change the meaning.

The cow jumped over the fence.

The cow jumped over the fence.

Not just some cow, but THE important one.

The cow jumped over the fence.

Not the dog or the horse, but the cow.

The cow jumped over the fence.

The cow didn't ram the fence, but it jumped.

The cow jumped over the fence.

It could jump high enough to get over.

The cow jumped over the fence.

Not just some fence, but the special fence.

The cow jumped over the fence.

Not the pond but the fence.

So with pickup and seduction, the game is not really just telling jokes and stories, but using subtext.

So not just what you say, but what you don't say, what you emphasize, what you don't emphasize, how you say it, what your body language is, when you say it. Pickup is really for guys that are already good at socializing. Most guys coming into pickup don't talk to people at all. Like playing football but not eating right and working out.

Going back to a girl talking about her exes, if she says it on a date, after some drinks, or after you've been together for months - all of those mean different things.

Title	Questions about compliments, exes
Author	evilcudmovement
Upvotes	7
Comments	3
Date	May 19, 2019 12:07 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/bqg718/questions_about_compliments_exes/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/questions-about-compliments-exes.1469195 https://theredarchive.com/post/1469195

Comments