How to approach/seal the deal when you're attractive but not exactly fully confident?

2020-04-14T03:30:26+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Ashree_1 · 2020-04-14T05:55:46+00:00

I think it’s good to keep in mind that most girls will be feeling the exact same. I don’t believe I’m an unattractive person and I’m a confident person too - but far out I’ve had nights out where not a single guy has approached me and that can really mess with a girls confidence.

I honestly believe this is because so many guys are afraid of rejection and are honestly out of practice. Back in the day the only way to pick up was at clubs, nowadays you have so many different avenues.

It’s so rare that I’ll go home with a guy I’ve just met at a club, I’m more likely to follow someone on insta and slide into their DMs and approach it that way. So don’t feel disheartened that you may be unsuccessful in that aspect.

I find that the nights where I’m most successful in the peen region are the ones where I don’t go out looking for it. They’re usually the nights where me and my girlfriends just want to go out and party and dance.

So my advice is try and go out and enjoy yourself with your friends rather than trying to pick up - therefore there’s no pressure if you don’t pick up and your confidence won’t be shot.

TopMali · 2020-04-14T03:14:08+00:00

I’m a bad dancer too but I love going out and what I do is go to shisha bars, I can sit, smoke up and spit my game and if I feel an urge of dancing there’s the option. Setting matters.

More importantly just be you, it’s sounds corny but it’s true, present yourself as the best version of yourself and I guarantee you’re going to get some

rextokyo · 2020-04-14T06:08:55+00:00

Did you say guys say you have "gorgeous eyes"...?

Your problem is that you are a pussy. Stop being a pussy.

Example: if your uncalibrated ass is picking up a girl is scoping you, you should have gone up to talk to her a minute ago.

But I bet you make some excuse to yourself to not go talk to her. You did that in your post, even. We could sit here and go over all the problems in your head that manifest in your game, but they all boil down to this: stop being a pussy.

Your ancestors hunted mammoths with sticks. You're afraid to talk to a girl? You're afraid to dance with a girl?

superduperkason · 2020-04-14T06:37:19+00:00

A lot of the problem is you’re expecting too much out of the situation. You said it yourself that you can hold a conversation pretty well, just do that. Worst case scenario you can get a snapchat or phone number and go from there. Not every girl is down to bang the guy she just met out so stop thinking there’s gonna be a seal the deal moment. Get a form of communication and build rapport. This also helps with approaching – just go up and talk to them about anything (except hitting on her immediately). If you act like you’re trying to get laid your true intentions are going to come out. Go up to them thinking ‘She’s cute I wonder what she’s like or what she likes’ not ‘She’s cute I wonder what she looks like naked’ take a genuine interest in these women and they will in you. Your confidence will increase as well. If you haven’t already try reading Models by Mark Manson I assume you have the time these days. In short stop thinking about getting laid and just take it one step at a time. Just be yourself, no games. Hope this helps more than the guy that ripped you a new one lol

mr_Tobbor · 2020-04-14T07:10:00+00:00

He is a 9 or 10 with pussy on his "instrument" regularly. WTF he wants from this subreddit?

IBeSomebooty · 2020-04-14T14:33:23+00:00

So it looks like your main problem is the approach. To escalate the approach there's many different "scripted" ways to do so. honestly PUA(pick up artist forums) have lots of ways to do this. But the best ways are to make your own, sometimes even on the spot. You'll get so used to it you'll have to make your own sometimes, because it gets so easy to use the ones that work over, and over.

Try to go out with friends. They'll notice you when you're attracted to a girl, and when you guys talk, talk about the girl and encourage each other to approach them. Usually look for a conversation starter, the first thing that comes to your mind.

Practice this with cashiers, uber drivers, ect. You practice conversing with the first thing that comes to mind, even a compliment, or something different once you get the hang of it.

bemore_ · 2020-04-14T12:08:24+00:00

Start with a shot and a beer

JustMyPhilosophy · 2020-04-14T12:17:05+00:00

Don't compromise for Instagram DMing girls imo.

Get to the root of the problem. Be honest with yourself. Don't avoid the problem.

In case you didn't know your problem is that you're shy and need to talk to girls.

Realise you have to learn this and you will fuck up a lot of times before having a solid amount of skill.

Don't make this shit too hard, remember:

Girls just want to have fun and meet a cool dude. That's it.

Walk up, introduce yourself, give a compliment, get the conversation rolling by asking questions you would like to know, or telling her a story you would like to tell her.

Yes: it's nerve wrecking, and thats completely fine. Just focus on making it fun/emotionally stimulating and lead.

If she is giving good signals, Take her hand, move her to another part of the club to isolate/makeout.

Just fucking do it.

Reha_A · 2020-04-15T01:19:26+00:00

First off specially since you are not sure of the vibe you put in just own that you are there to talk to her simply because you are a man and she is a women even though that's causing sort of fear that's how you stand out as first step.

Title	How to approach/seal the deal when you're attractive but not exactly fully confident?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	18
Comments	28
Date	April 14, 2020 2:38 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/g0x92v/how_to_approachseal_the_deal_when_youre/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-approachseal-the-deal-when-youre-attractive.1493979 https://theredarchive.com/post/1493979

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