How do I talk to my gf during sex

recyclablebanthas · 2021-01-10T10:37:44+00:00

1

..... she always tells me to talk to her while we’re having sex and I don’t know what to say

Talking during sex can be pretty jarring because it requires a part of your brain to activate which is often turned off during sex. For some people I can lead to overthinking, which can take them out of the moment.

Then for some people it's just normal for them.

Talking during sex is not everyone's thing. If it's not your thing, that's okay.

2

If talking during sex is not your thing, then you have a choice.

Watch some porn, maybe with her, and listen for things you like in the dialogue.
Flat out tell her it's not your thing, if it's not.
If she talks during sex, then pay attention to what she says and play off of it, if you want. (Note: If she doesn't talk during sex and she expects you to, then that doesn't give you much to work with.)

3

This is the wrong subreddit for this question. You might post it in /r/sex

TheNangaInsaan · 2021-01-10T05:49:03+00:00

You say what you would do to her. That's it.

Demnian1422 · 2021-01-10T08:25:51+00:00

I'd guess its dirty talk. I love it too, it makes me hornier and it shows that she's enjoying me. I'd say something like this: You are so tight. I love the taste of your pssy. I want to taste your pssy. I want to put it in slowly, so you feel every inch 1 after the other. I can't wait to be inside you. I want you to feel me inside you. You are getting tighter (you know when to say that). I want you in XXX pose, I can feel every little part of your p*ssy.

To be honest it's hard to talk while you are in the process your mouth is full. But I will try more dirty talk from now on. This is a good reminder.

I am pretty good at sexting. I think you can set the mood like that for when you or she comes home. You say you are thinking of her and you just play a scenario of what you want to do to her: I am thinking of how I want to kiss your soft lips and put my hands in your hair. Smell your perfume, feel your soft skin. I want to kiss your neck and slowly move down to your breasts. I want to squeeze them tight, they are amazing. Then I will move down your belly while I reach your...pause...sweet p*ussy. I am getting excited just thinking about it. I want to kiss it and lick it slowly from top to bottom, just to show you what's waiting for you. I want to kiss your feet down to your toes...and then go back up until I reach your pushy and then I will... well, I will show you when I/you get home. / And when she comes home you do exactly what you said you are going to do.

While sexting for the 5th time you can mix it up, different poses, how you want to feel x, how you want her to feel x, you want her to do x because of x. Different places, different rooms, tables, counters, etc.

If you get her very horny prior to penetrarion, she will cum in 1-2 minutes. If you are able to resist Cumming yourself give her a second while you kiss her lips or p*ssy if you made her cum that way and say " I am not finished with you. I want you to feel xxxx (while xxx is the feeling she will get while yo do xyz). Or just say that you are not finished with her and take control.

WriterWhoWantedToDie · 2021-01-10T05:49:59+00:00

Just compliment her lol. Youre so beautiful and yada yada.

Tho if she likes dirty talk... idk

_Dignity_ · 2021-01-10T05:59:34+00:00

You need to be more specific. Does she want reassurance about her body and that you're feeling good? Does she want dirty talk? Is she submissive and wants BDSM kind of talk?

It's a dumb question because you haven't actually explored it enough.

The-Nth-Doctor · 2021-01-10T07:36:00+00:00

I assume the "talk" desired by your GF is dirty bedroom banter rather than discussions of peer reviewed research papers. :)

The beginner's formula for dirty talk is actually very simple. Use this template until you're more comfortable with it:

Say what you're going to do. ("I'm going to pound you til you can't take it anymore!")
Say what you're doing. (You love it when I pound you like this, don't you?")
Say what you did. ("I pounded you so hard... you're gonna feel it for a week!")

Base the suggestive intensity and implied sexual aggression on her comfort level and kink preferences, which you must clarify beforehand! For example, does she like "bad words" like slt, btch, whore, etc? Ask her which words are 100% off limits (i.e. many women hate the word cnt, but are okay with other forms of degrading language when spoken by a trusted partner).

The BDSM advice forums are excellent sources for this particular bedroom issue.

Also, most guys don't know this, but women LOVE to hear their man moan, gasp, and make other sounds of sexual enjoyment. Asking you to talk may simply be her way of asking you to be more vocally demonstrative if you're otherwise quiet in bed.

Bottom line... Just ask her! :)

IvyChaste · 2021-01-10T07:41:51+00:00

This is a really good question... for your girlfriend. Some girls like it dirty and rough. Some girls like it clean and blunt. So many different women with so many different preferences... if you’re too embarrassed to ask her, then try a variation to see what she likes. If she doesn’t like it, she will ask you not to say it again. However, if she does like it, her body will react in a very pleasant way and encourage you further.

kettlebell_workout · 2021-01-10T09:33:09+00:00

Your mindset has to be "The only reason why she is her is to pleasure me". It is totally not correct, and actually is the opposite, but you have to set your mind into this roleplay.

Everything you say stems from this mindset. Here are the following areas you need to focus:

Commands. Tell her how to position yourself, how to hold hands, legs. Tell her what she must do, HOW to do it, etc. You can go so far that you can EVEN control her orgasm. I have never had a woman who would not like to be commanded.
Anticipation. Tell her what YOU will do to her before doing it. The hardest part is to DELAY your action. You really need to have an imagination of "WHY", you are not doing it. Most of the times you will use a Reward/Punishment. It consists of two things: Suppression and Gratification. The longer you can suppress gratification, the HIGHER the anticipation. You will use the reward as a means for gratification, and punishment as a means of surpression.
Reward/Punishment. This one is very important as well. It relates to the first point of giving her commands. If she does it right, then you REWARD her, if she does something not RIGHT then you PUNISH her. The interesting thing, that women LOVE to comply, cause they seek for gratification. But that reduces anticipation, so you should focus more on punishment. So give commands, such that she would fail, like command her to not to make noise. That's very hard to do, and she will fail.
Humiliation. Not always it works. And NEVER start with that. But if a woman has a very masculine job, like a manager. Then you can explore humiliation. I think it is a way to release their accumulated stress.

Those are the main areas you should focus on during sex. When you can master them verbally, then you can play around with some BDSM tools.

Title	How do I talk to my gf during sex
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	4
Comments	11
Date	January 10, 2021 5:46 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ku8lka/how_do_i_talk_to_my_gf_during_sex/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-i-talk-to-my-gf-during-sex.1508344 https://theredarchive.com/post/1508344

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