How to Let a Girl Know It's Okay to Have Sex With You, And How To Make It Easy For Her.

Two initial points: First don’t do this unless you KNOW and, second, don’t do this unless you MEAN IT.

Confused? You won’t be. Read on.

Every so often we meet people (young women in my case) that we KNOW we are going to have sex with. I don’t mean “irrational self-confidence” but you just KNOW with a high degree of certainty that you will be testing out her vaginal elasticity with your meat dagger. Great! So you can get down to bus….

Put that sword AWAY, D’Artagnan!

Now, the siege begins.

Most women will make you wait. Why? Because they want to weed out the fuckbois (unless they don’t but that’s a different situation, and if you are a fuckboi, you know it already, and can safely move on.) The problem is the “Make Him Wait” strategy creates too many false positives, and men who would be perfectly suitable for them but don’t enjoy being tortured nope out also.¹ Then the girls say, “See?! I KNEW you were just a fuckboi!” Well, not really, but I don’t like having to hump it through the Desert of No Pussy without any water, meanwhile, at every oasis I pass there’s a fuckboi getting sex on zero effort. “Why does that guy get all the Fun Times and I get all the Hassle?!” I wonder, internally. Because this one wants to weed out the fuckbois, and that results in an inversion of the “Fun Times to Hassle Ratio”² that leaves both the man and the woman unsatisfied.

So what to do about it? Well, lets say that you have lured your quarry back to hers/yours/a hotel, and Fun Times seem imminent. You get right down to the goal line and then she stops you cold, and not in the cutesy, LMR (Last Minute Resistance) kind of way because she doesn’t want YOU to think she’s a slut (which you should be willing to stipulate to), but in the ASD (Anti-Slut Defense) kind of way that it so that SHE won’t think she’s a slut. It’s a problem.

Deep down, she wants you to win, and if you’ve played your cards right, her pussy is already on your side. So when you get stonewalled, pause and suggest a chat, which you will lead, because that is much more likely to get you to Happy Town. Call it a “back channel” discussion if you want. It’s meant to be real talk. Note: This may be too direct for some of you; I find “direct” works for me.

Start with “I like how I don’t have to talk to you like you are ‘other people,’ and I hope you feel the same.”

Her: <agrees>

You: “So, look, you already know we’re going to smash eventually. Why keep torturing me and yourself? At some point you’re just going to have to trust me.”

Her: “But you could be a fuckboi.”

You: “I know, but I’m not.

Her: “But that’s exactly what a fuckboi would say!”

You: “I know, but I’m not. So you’re torturing a good guy for no reason, and at some point you’re going to have to trust me.”

So now you have just lit the fuse. It might be a LONG fuse. Women think and overanalyze shit for literally HOURS. You want her thinking about what YOU want her to think about, which is her giving YOU her pussy.

Once you learn how to do this, you can do it in Very Advanced Ways. I know a girl who is really into D/s³ and is now happily in my harem and eager to be a corner square in some Girl-Girl-Dave tic-tac-toe, but first, she had to make sure that I wasn’t just a fuckboi, and second, being a submissive woman can be pretty terrifying, at least the first time she lets as new guy tie her up, he could secretly be a sex maniac - psycho killer. After the first time you can point out that you didn’t murder her the last time, etc. Don’t use the word “murder” though, say “Hey, I remember you having a lot of fun last time, and everything being ok.” Remember that thing I said about overanalyzing things? Yeah, that’s why you don’t say “murder” or “psycho killer”, etc. Don’t let any negative associations get stuck in her brain.

So back on point, I proposed a “trust exercise.” I proposed tying her up, but me not fucking her unless she asked me to. She agreed to this. I know, right? It sounds strange, but that’s how things work in my life. I should totes be in sales. Bear in mind I had already fingered her and climaxed her a few times on our first date, including her first G-spot orgasm, thus creating a positive feedback loop in her brain, Dave = PLEASURE, so that was part of it. So after about 5-10 minutes of her being tied up (on her back, hands cuffed behind, legs held open with a spreader bar) and caressed I got the first “I really want you to fuck me!” out of her. Did I fuck her right away? Nope. I teased her by flipping the script, while continuing to caress her to peak her arousal.

Me: “Are you sure you’re not just saying that to get into my pants?”

Her: “Yes!”

Me: “You’re really sure?”

Her: “Yes!”

Me: “You’re really, extra-super sure?”

Her: “Yes! Yes! Yes! Fuck me already!”

So I did. Doing it this way makes her “earn it” a bit and if she has any post-coital regret, you can point out that you made her tell you “YES!” three times. You can also then switch gears about how hot it was that she just WANTED you, and then give her some comfort about how exciting that was for you because you wanted her, too. Whatever the situation calls for to make her FEEL GOOD about having had sex with you. Women operate on FEELZ. So the more she associates you with PLEASURE and you making her FEEL GOOD, the better it is for you.

Another Pro-Tip: Ask her what her deepest, most secret, greasiest little fantasy is. If you can make it happen, do it. It may start out tame or cliché – “I wanna make love on the beach at sunset!!!”⁴ That’s some Hallmark Channel – If the Hallmark Channel was R-rated – crapola. Repeat, “I want your DEEPEST, DARKEST, MOST TWISTED SECRET fantasy.” You will get two results over and over: “Tie me up!” and “I wanna do another girl!” I will cover both more extensively in later posts.

You want her to be comfortable having Dirty, Dirty Sex with you because that’s the most fun sex. So you have to assure her that you (a) don’t judge, and (b) will keep your mouth shut after. Discretion can be your friend. When I was a senior at uni I got a freshman co-ed’s V-card because, and this is as direct a quote as I can remember: “I heard the other girls talk about you and they all said you didn’t brag.” So whatever you do, keep it between you, and she will be willing to do more fun stuff for you.

Ok, now back to the first part. Remember how I said only if you mean it? Because if you lie to get pussy, you are just creating more damaged girls. I try to operate on the Campfire Principle – and leave a girl better than I found her. She’s going to know a lot more about her sexuality than before me, and if she wants to learn from my life experience (negotiations, personal finance, Life 101, yada-yada) she can also. That part is up to her. If I can let her down easy, I will and I don’t want to leave her damaged. So long as she’s down with my program, she can stay as long as she wants. If that changes, then it might be better for her to move on. Simples.

Takeaways:

-Women operate on FEELZ. You want to create a positive feedback loop in her mind about you.

-Seduce her brain AND her pussy. They are your two most powerful allies.

-Create positive feedback loops so she associates you with Pleasure.

-Do not create more damaged girls.

¹ That’s me. I will happily give a girl a (non-exclusive) relationship, especially if she is down to do threeways. So long as my relationship “product” is better than Beta Bob’s, I am going to have some success in this.

² I stole this from Dr. Orion Teraban who puts out videos on the “Psy Hacks” YouTub channel. You should go subscribe.

³ D/s = Dominance and Submission. IOW, she likes being tied up and helpless and at my mercy, which, admittedly, is pretty fun for me also. You can think of it like BDSM, usually plus bondage but minus pain/humiliation. I am a bit of a great big knuckledragger and women taught me that this is what they wanted from me. I realized that playing this role for them put me on the Express Train to Pound Town, so I went with it – “So wait, if I tie you up, spank your ass and make you call me ‘Daddy’, that gets me to Sexyville, faster? Yes, please.”

⁴ No, she doesn’t. Nobody does. Two words: Sand. Crevices. That’s a “No” from me Dawg.