Currently having an existential crisis on how I (20, M) should treat women - what's the best way to proceed for someone who does want an LTR with a girl but has so far (6 weeks, 10 official dates) treated her unlike a TRPer would?

Mastros34 · 2015-09-08T23:09:08+00:00

The fact in number 1 she said she has some "mental barriers" to get past is instant red flag to me. If you're already exclusive whats the difference between that and a girlfriend? Also why would you offer the opportunity to ask her. Your the prize. Remember men are the gatekeepers of relationships, woman are the gatekeepers of sex you just straight up opened your gate and made you unattractive in the process.

Could be she's a bit shy but also means she isn't feeling the full force of the endorphin yet. Also a possible sign she's ridden the CC or you're being too beta.
Red flag again man, she's telling you your too much of a girl and that's gonna dry her right up. Models may say to be open more but it doesn't mean to be transparent. If you don't keep an air of mystery it becomes boring to woman.
I always try to keep this aspect a mystery and yes it was. Luckily as long as you don't harp on it she won't think much of it.

Whatever you decide to do just alpha up. And try to do more then just follow a script. Actually embody RP, once you do you'll be able to avoid these pitfalls. The fake it till you make it can only bring you so far.

justbrowsingkthanks · 2015-09-09T00:15:26+00:00

this is not an existential crisis.
you already know the answer but dont want to accept it. you want to use trp without doing what trp teaches. you know you have oneitis and dont want that to change. would you tell someone who wants to play a guitar that he doesnt need to use the frets?

Hecticchow · 2015-09-09T09:21:43+00:00

Have you engaged in sexual intercourse with this girl? Sex needs to be happening on the 1-3 date, or else you will be labeled as a beta bitchboy provider and she will put the pussy on a pedestal, to be used as a currency to get what she wants.

SarsaparillaCorona · 2015-09-08T23:03:51+00:00

You shouldn't need to ask that, it should be obvious. You'll know it's happened that way when you look back on your relationship and she says "even though you asked me out at X time, I was waiting for you to ask since Y time". In asking, you've pretty much said "I want to be monogamous with you if that's okay with you", which is repairable, but sets up a power dynamic favouring her.
Instigating everything is normal, but there's a good way and a bad way. Again, time will tell which way she saw it happen, but she should be waiting for you to instigate things because you're the man, not you instigating it because you want to and letting her play emotional catch up.
Oooooh. That's bad. See, Models does speak of emotional openness, but the overarching theme is you display that through actions. You display your interest openly, you display your attraction openly, you display your happiness and pride openly, but those are displayed through actions, not words. And more popular? Who gives a fuck, a relationship is between 2 people, and currently she's ahead of you.
Wow. Yep, bad move. See, unlike women, who have hymens and stretching pains and an overarching ignorance to their bodies, men just have dicks. Sex is gonna feel the same the first time and every time after that, fuck, I lost my virginity to my current LTR (at 17) and she thought I was some kind of sex god, I plan on telling her on our wedding night (if that even happens at all).

See. A long term relationship should only happen if you get more out of it than you would casual hookups. Your LTR should feel the need to crack open your stoic exterior and find the gooey, lovey, loving boyfriend, she always wanted and now depends on like a drug. The process of doing so should be a task she wants to complete, and the basis of your relationship should be that her, out of all the other girls who tried before her, finally cracked you open. As soon as she doesn't constantly thank you for that, or takes it for granted, or squeezes you for more you can dose out in a certain period, your relationship is as good as doomed.

You said it yourself, the person who has the power in the relationship is the person who wants the other person the least. But that doesn't mean you like them less, it means you've inflated them with all these feels and now they just think you're the best person ever. There's signs you're doing that, but because you're new to this and she seems like the first person whose come along and really taken you, you're positioning yourself as the person with the most to lose if left. What I recommend you do is take a step back, find out what cards you have left and hold onto them for dear life until she gives up enough of hers to make it in your favour again. If that doesn't work out, just take it as a lesson and try again with a new girl.

There's other aspects to this, but I think other people will touch on that.

Lumberjack1234 · 2015-09-09T01:11:47+00:00

My advice is to just let the relationship flow. Follow your instincts and be yourself. Do not be afraid to love her. Give it all you got.

Then, after you get burned hard, come back here and we will begin.

Sementeries · 2015-09-09T01:38:50+00:00

Dude, you are 20. Bitches don't want to be tied down by some dude who gives away his commitment like some cheap whore.

Learn how to get girls first and then get into a relationship.

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