Hello all,

m in his mid-twenties, went to my first clubbing night out after having been out of game for 6 years because of a relationship. Handsome, have around 15 pimples/post-acne that I'm treating but anyway. Quite charismatic, sociable. 6"1.

I arrive at the venue shortly after the opening. Immediately, I start opening random people just to get into the mood. Spoke with bouncer, the visual engineer and asked basic questions about the venue. Sure I made these connections also in order to have a recall point. Yes, I read this great post by u/FriendlyWrenChilling, thanks man. Also my third recall point happened to be two guys sitting at a table. I approached them and asked if I might sit down. We talked for 5 minutes, they thought I was an undercover agent because I don't drink, smoke and am not willing to do any drugs.

Anyways, after having made these connections, I gathered more courage to go and approach some beautiful women. I just want to say quickly about the things I didn't like about the place that definitely lowered my mood sometimes and even turned me off completely: the cigarette smoke almost everywhere, even the ventilation wasn't so effective against it. The music was 95% ass. I disliked it, I won't explain further. The dance floor is around 60 square meters, which makes for less movement and just feels small. A small amount of people/weak rotation of people - few newcomers throughout the opening hours. I had trouble hearing people all the time because of the music, I had to re-ask questions over and over which, I think, robbed me of the establishment of vibes with the girls and just ruined it all to some extent. Although there weren't few people so to say, but it's just that I managed to make notice of everybody after 2 hours into the thing. And I basically ran out of options after these 2 hours. The number of unique options was around 5. (the girls who appealed to me the most and qualified for my interest). So the flaws that I point out are, to some extent, my excuses as to why I acted retarded and didn't close anybody.

Soooo my first shot was with these 3 girls who were friends. Don't recall how I approached, but I opened one of them and she partook in the convo pretty well. We exchanged basic info about ourselves, she soon said she isn't interested in meeting new people. Which is a close by herself. I said, "no worries I am not even hitting on you". I asked her to introduce me to her friends; I really liked the blonde girl out of the trio. Now, I understand, that I should've just moved on to the blondie myself in order to open her; instead of asking the initial girl to introduce us. Maybe it's a small blip and I'm overthinking. Anyway, now comes the moment when my mood lowered: I heard the name of the blondie from the blondie herself, and simply after that came a pause which I didn't care to/manage to fill. I didn't think about what to do, so I just sailed away slowly, dancing. Now I understand, I shoulda just opened the blondie and done a simple exchange of basic info, banter, flirt, classical stuff, you know. I hold no regrets, anyway, the main thing is I am learning from the mistakes. After having failed to attempt to open the first girl I liked, I think I gravitated between some recall points, talked to some other guys, danced around with them. If you ask me, why I didn't think twice and just return to the blondie - well, I was taken by the flow of my lack of experience/maybe the spark wasn't this high? I work 6 days a week and, being there in the night, I wasn't at the top of my energy, believe me. The blondie eyed me multiple times afterwards, while standing with the guys that picked up her and her group which turns me on right now, to an extent. Yeah I shoulda said hi to her and approached their group just to check in on her, who knows, maybe she would have thrown herself at me, and there ain't no proof that she enjoyed being around those guys very much.

Second shot was shot at two girls who were dancing. I introduced myself and naturally clinged more the nicer one of the two. Same things: exchange of info, some bantering, soon I realized that the girl wasn't feeling it. Wasn't reciprocating nor asking me back. So I quickly ejected myself.

Haha you're gonna call me a newbie for this one and/or a privileged dick. I was, at this moment, just dancing, vibing by myself, and slowly crept towards a girl I found cute but not very impressive(7/10). I conceived a plan of just building some tension for 2 minutes, that would occur due to the fact that I was near her and due to the fact that she'd eventually see me. Yeah, I was willing to approach by myself after that, but I was just interested in this interesting stunt. And it worked, she eventually (after 3 minutes) turned around and moved her glass towards my mouth as if to offer to me her drink. I declined and just opened her onwards. Exchange of basic info, got a compliment from her about the people of my ethnicity, I then made a similar compliment to her. 1 minute of talking and after a 5-seconds' pause, I offer her to dance. Well, she just held my hand, moved it upwards and just circled around herself, around this center being our arms, held up. Sounds stupid but I just don't know the name of this typical dance(intro to the dance?), but we used to do it in my school quite often.

When she stopped circling around, I froze a bit because I didn't know the dancing moves, that would entail physicality or which actions to take next. Grab her waist and dance slowly? The music wouldn't fit. I acted like a bore because I didn't physically escalate further, more so after her having broken the touch barrier by herself. Now I get it, that I shoulda rested my hand on her shoulder/waist and continued the fucking conversation lol, while flirting, bantering and physically escalating. Well, 10 seconds in after the end of our merry-go-around, a guy comes up behind her, says something in her ear and rests his arm around her neck lol; basically hijacking her; immediately, they went away. Well, I get it now, he did what I was supposed to lol. When I saw that I paid no mind and continued vibing/dancing. Of course, I felt some kind of a defeat, but it was justified because I messed up. No worries... It's good for the first time. Now I also understand that I have pretty high standards regarding looks, and I woulda been much more assertive and dominant, had she been my type &/or sexier. Mind you, I still woulda banged her. Yeah.

Later on, I caught her eyeing me twice/thrice with the expression of "wtf, why?" while dancing with/being around this guy who "took his turn" with her. And she even bumped into me when I was chilling at a table, to make me notice her and her new guy. To no avail.

The third approach encounter was when I was throwing hands, vibing, jumping, just dancing, basically, and there was this group of around 7 people who came from a reserved table and were just dancing in a circle. I stood behind this big-booty 30ish yo woman, but not in a very close proximity meaning I wasn't willing to grind against her or something like that. Anyway, for 4-5 times, back to back, she turned around to check if I was there, looked at me, dancingly approached me, "by accident", still with her back turned to me and lightly grinded her butt against my leg almost touching my cock, and, of course, I get it, she did only the right leg because a blatant grinding on the cock would be too much, considering we didn't even talk at all. Yeah, it was flattering and all, but I was puzzled by these acts and WASN'T PREPARED LOL, didn't collect myself to think. Now I get it that I shoulda just laid my hand on her shoulder or tapped it and said hi to confirm her interest, shoulda kept escalating basically. Do you all think it was an accident and it's typical of clubbing? No, more likely, she was digging me.

I left the club soon after I understood that all the girls are taken, and I saw all of them.

The moral for me is this - I will do night game when I have more free time and only in more pleasant venues. I don't regret a thing, I'm proud of myself, my decision is to keep breaking the ice of my fears and keep racing into the daygame, which I enjoy much more. I've been in the daygame for two weeks only, and I like it better. You break your barriers, face your fears, grow balls when approaching chicks. And they're not desperate, nor drunk, nor low-quality.

I have had zero approaches, because of sheer anxiety and some stupid excuses like "there are 3 meters of grass between us and we're walking parallel to each other, so that would be considered intrusive if I approached her" and so on. But with each venture of this fortnight I become bolder and more ballsy. Just watch, I will freaking slay it from now on. After this experience at the club and flirting with the game, smelling the opportunity for sex, and having a chick stolen under my nose I am sure, I will do as many approaches as possible from now on.

Now the question to you, guys:

- how should I behave in similar situations when they hijack my chick like this?

Never doubt yourselves, get the heck out and APPROACH.