Hey guys,

I (34M, Indian) could use some advice because I’m getting mixed signals from a girl I met recently.

Here’s the story:

  • A few days ago at a salsa party, I met a Spanish girl (30F). She came with a guy, maybe a date, not sure. But she asked me to dance (both salsa and bachata) a few times.
  • While dancing, she was flirting with me, making lots of eye contact, asking me questions, smiling a lot. At one point, she even called me handsome and joked that we should “get drinks sometime.”
  • I got her socials and asked her out and met after 4 days.

The date:

  • We met at a rooftop bar, cozy atmosphere, had drinks, played around with a guitar. Lots of banter and teasing (she teased me more than I teased her), and she was being playful and touchy.
  • When she went out for a smoke, I tried to kiss her, but she deflected. She laughed it off saying, “Why are you Indians so straightforward, so aggressive?” She compared me to Spanish/Colombian guys being less forward.
  • Later, we went to another salsa social and danced for about an hour straight. Tons of eye contact, hugging, touching, she complimented my dancing, called me sexy, said she liked my smile.
  • But when I tried to kiss her while dancing, again she didn’t reciprocate.

The situation now:

  • She’s leaving the country in 10 days. I’m going on vacation for a week, so there’s almost not much overlap.
  • There’s only one evening before I leave that we could meet again, but she said she already has plans. She added, “we can meet after you come back.” But realistically, she’ll only be around for maybe 1 evening after I return.
  • Now I can’t tell if she’s genuinely interested but just wants to take it slower (maybe doesn’t kiss early) OR if she’s politely rejecting me while keeping me around.

At first, I was sure she was attracted her words, body language, and attention were strong signals. But the fact that she rejected two kiss attempts and isn’t making strong efforts to meet before she leaves has me second-guessing everything.

My questions:

  1. Is this just playful flirting with no intention, or is she actually into me but moving slower?
  2. Should I push for that one night before my vacation, or just leave it and see if she really wants to meet after?

Any advice would be appreciated.