Communication changed immediately after our first date. Am I overthinking this, or should I step back? (27F dating 28M)

Peanut_Cheese888 · 2026-07-06T15:05:15+00:00

Nah if a man really likes you he makes sure there is no doubt about that

Dionne005 · 2026-07-06T15:28:40+00:00

Girl don’t be with a man with kids at your age. Please. Sounds like you want stress. Especially a man that has less custody of his children. The flag is bleeding

mamahousewife · 2026-07-06T20:59:52+00:00

He’s not interested, and honestly even if he was he doesn’t seem like worrying too much about in the first place. I put single dads in the same range as single moms, only worth dating if you’re still single over 35. Or if you have children yourself. Settle down with a nice guy who you don’t have to second guess he’s interested and has no baggage. Kids or mental health wise.

Jenneapolis · 2026-07-06T17:19:38+00:00

How long ago was your first date? It's best to let him ask you out and not to ask. You have to work on being more chill and patient. I know it's so hard but this is how you play the game so to speak. Right now, if you are asking him if he lost interest and are asking him out, you are pursuing him and you want it to be the other way around.

Wife_and_Mama · 2026-07-06T19:16:17+00:00

This guy has kids and struggles with his mental health to the point that he can't answer a text on logistics. You're not missing anything and shouldn't beat yourself up.

All that said, you should have given it a second date. You say you don't expect constant texting, but it seems like you expect constant texting. Before you meet, you're trying to get to know each other, at least a little bit, via text. Once you've met, though, the relationship needs to grow in person. Texting a lot isn't really the best idea to get to know someone, since you can't hear tone or inflection. Men also don't tend to be as big of texters as women. My husband and I would actually got a couple of days without texting, even when had been on a few dates. This is not a good litmus test for whether or not a man is interested. The people telling you that "if you have to wonder, he's not interested" are wrong. Everyone wonders about everything in the early stages. Anxiety about this stuff is normal. Don't go nuclear over something so minor next time.

sine120 · 2026-07-06T15:45:52+00:00

Generally if you're at the point where you need to make a reddit post about someone's behavior, the situation is not normal. People need to trust their gut more, it's right 99% of the time.

kaos16fwbladieshmu · 2026-07-06T15:42:57+00:00

Move on he's not interested in anything meaningful probably holding you there while trying to play multiple girls . If he liked you he'd be consistent with before your date especially if you haven't slept with him . Either way don't waste your time .

AutoModerator · 2026-07-06T14:55:08+00:00

Title: Communication changed immediately after our first date. Am I overthinking this, or should I step back? (27F dating 28M)

Author Icy_Sentence_1791

Full text: I’m 27F and he’s 28M. He has kids from a previous relationship, but they live with their mum and he’s not the primary caregiver. He’s been single for about 2 years.

Before we met, he replied to my messages almost straight away. We had our first date and I thought it went really well. Since then, he’s started taking hours to reply, even though I’ve seen him online on WhatsApp.

I asked him directly if he’d lost interest, and he said no. He said he’d just had a bad mental health day and had been really busy.

Today I asked if he wanted to meet again, and I’m waiting to hear back. I don’t expect constant texting, but I do value consistency, and this sudden change is making me anxious and overthinking as I really like him.

Am I overthinking this, or is this usually a sign that someone’s interest has changed? Or should I stop worrying about the texting and just let his actions speak for themselves?

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Sea_Bookkeeper_1533 · 2026-07-08T03:57:55+00:00

It does sound like hes lost interest. However you absolutely should not be asking him that. Just let the behaviour speak for itself. You had one date and you are already demanding he talk to u a lot etc. Thats quite unhealthy. You should be out living your life barely noticing his delays. Its giving anxious and clingy and if he was losing interest before u showed clinging, you made it way worse. You gotta be comfortable with dates not going anywhere especially after one date.

Reasonable_Doubt1863 · 2026-07-06T20:27:38+00:00

You did what seems right to me. Block him and goobye.

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