Where do you get your motivation?

Josewasframed · 2016-02-13T01:27:55+00:00

It's been more than a year since I discovered TRP and during that time I've lifted, changed my diet and my habits, also my worldview is completely different from what it was. But even though I can see the progress I've made I'm still thirsty, I'm still unable to be as successful with women as I want to be.

Good to hear that you're improving your life. But I feel like you're making TRP into 1+2=3 (1 being physically healthy, 2 being mentally healthy, 3 being successful with women). Unfortunately, TRP is not that way. It will improve your chances and ability to get women, but it is not a "do this and this result will always happen" kind of deal.

Also, you say you're still thirsty, that you're not as successful with women as you want to be. You say this in a way that tells me it is giving you a lot of trouble, maybe some stress. If that is the case, then you need to ask yourself why you are stressing out about not getting women so much. Is it because you're just really horny all the time? Afraid of being alone? Your dad was married when he was your age, and you feel like you should be too? Ask yourself why you are stressed over this and that should help you find what you need to work on within yourself.

I'm saying all of this from a place of experience. I thought I'd start lifting, eating better, sleeping well, and seeing the world with a TRP lens and everything would be magical; I'd start getting girls, they'd approach me, I'd get hotter women, etc. It frustrated me too when it didn't happen.

I couldn't figure it out, but then I read several posts and they started to help me see. There are lots of posts like yours on this subreddit as well as the main one, where guys think that TRP should working by now. The top comments on those posts are golden, so I'd recommend you read them as they helped me see things.

The most important thing I learned that helped me become less stressed out and not angry/frustrated was this: I learned that even though I had pretty much implemented all the golden rules of TRP (lifting, being healthy, setting boundaries, reading, being my best self yada yada) that I was still mentally dependent on finding my own life's value in getting women. I used to think that because I wasn't getting women, or quality women, that I was failing. But that couldn't be further from the truth.

I learned to be happy by myself. I learned to respect myself and realize that I value my value, for lack of more terms to describe it. I started building a life that I was so proud of, with so much value, that it was no longer about me going out to get women, it became about them trying to get me. I have become less quick to give out my value to any pretty face that walks by. Am I still interested in them? Hell yes, but if I'm going to pursue any type of relationship with any girl, I need to know that it's a two way street. She has value that I like, I have value she likes. How this differs from the way you are experiencing TRP is that you still are pursuing women with this mentality of "Hey girls, I did all this stuff, got stronger, healthier, smarter. Don't you like me now?". That is not the way it should be. It should be, "Hey girls, I have built my own life of value without you. Everyday I am improving my life to live the best life possible for myself. I am reluctant to give any of my time, effort, commitment to you because I value that time, effort, and commitment. What do you bring to the table, girls, to convince me that you're worthy of entering into my life?". Sounds high-horsed but it's truth.

I'm sure the other responses you're gonna get will be similar to mine and will help you.

Pro tip: something that helped me really well when I was in your predicament is listen to some youtube videos of Patrice ONeal and his ideas on men/women dynamics. Dude's a genius and speaks RP truth.

Ladd_MaccAodh · 2016-02-13T04:35:39+00:00

I've lifted, changed my diet and my habits, also my worldview is completely different from what it was.

Good! Now, what have you done to become better at talking with women? If your answer isn't "Gone out and actually talked to some, and actually made honest attempts to flirt", then you're doing it wrong. You're mistaking activity for productivity.

As for motivation and the cold cruel world, you need a changed worldview. You don't have to view the world as sunshine and unicorn farts, but you have to at least view it as something that can be conquered even at its most harsh. There can be no motivation where there is no possible glory or success. Straighten that out. Focus on things you believe you can accomplish and work your way up from there.

EntitledShitHead · 2016-02-13T01:46:38+00:00

This is a very good question. You're problem is that you're not thinking big. Your current dreams and ambitions aren't big enough to motivate you. No body wants to bust their ass for a shitty car, average girlfriend and mediocre job. You have to make short term goals for yourself (things you can achieve in 6months) and long term goals (what you want your life to be like in 10 years). I write my goals on my mirror and look at them everyday right after i wake up. These goals motivate me to pull all-nighters for school and bust my ass off in the gym. Make goals that make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

As for your second question about women, how many dates have you gone on? How many numbers have you got? How many cold approaches have you done? Help me understand where you're at.

I'm gonna be honest and manage your expectations. i've been on TRP since June. At first, I just read this shit, but didn't implement. It wasn't until January that I got serious. I started talking to girls everywhere and asking for numbers like crazy. I've been on a shit ton of first dates and I've fucked up a lot of them so bad. After every date, I reflect on what I did write and what I did wrong. Sometimes I get the girl to text me, and scoring has become a bit easier as I've gone on more dates.

dr_warlock · 2016-02-13T05:19:09+00:00

You're fighting at least 2 decades of blue pill conditioning, the effects don't just go away. It takes time.

RemyPrice · 2016-02-13T01:25:04+00:00

You stand for something greater than yourself.

TheBadGod · 2016-02-13T06:13:21+00:00

Have you considered the Six Sigma method of life fulfillment?

rumham730 · 2016-02-13T06:28:24+00:00

Motivation comes and goes. You need discipline.

Terror_of_the_Void · 2016-02-15T12:34:25+00:00

It's part of my identity: How can I call myself a redpiller if I don't even lift? How can I call myself a pickup artist if I don't even approach girls? How can I expect to get results if I'm not even willing to put in the work.

Title	Where do you get your motivation?
Author	martnbx
Upvotes	4
Comments	12
Date	February 13, 2016 12:56 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/45hwg8/where_do_you_get_your_motivation/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/where-do-you-get-your-motivation.160688 https://theredarchive.com/post/160688

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