Have you been "objectified", as feminists say? Did you dislike it?

VigilantRedRooster · 2016-10-10T16:28:42+00:00

This discussion is better suited for PurplePillDebate. Thread locked.

idkdudette · 2016-10-10T14:55:32+00:00

You are 16 years old and though obviously academically smart since you are already in college, I would really encourage you to take some classes on women's studies and read more about sexual assault and harassment. You replying to every comment asking why they didn't feel flattered after clearly giving you examples of vulgar behavior leads me to worry about you.

You are also 16 years old claiming to give $500 a month to your boyfriend after being somewhat emancipated by your parents since they supported you moving out.

Do not let the buzzword "feminist" blind you from unacceptable behavior by people.

electrokiwi · 2016-10-10T12:24:58+00:00

I've definitely been objectified, and if I was walking alone, it has made me uncomfortable. I'm not talking about basic compliments either, but a tone, and a look, and even some following that was in poor taste. I don't mind catching a man's eye if I'm looking good, but there's no need to go out of your way to approach me while cursing and licking your lips. I've also been groped before by strangers, though once was in high school. The idea that a grown man felt he could grab at me without my permission was upsetting. These sorts of behaviors are never as welcome as a direct, respectful approach or compliment.

TheItalianHousewife · 2016-10-10T15:06:14+00:00

Personally I love being a little objectified. I know I'm probably in the minority on that but I feel a bit flattered when it happens.

rainyweathergirl · 2016-10-10T13:50:57+00:00

I can't say I enjoy being cat called at all. I'm not pretty, and it hasn't happened to me much in my life, but when it did happen it felt embarrassing and like a complete invasion of my personal space. I am a very shy person who hates talking to strangers. I remember it happening to me as a teen. a group of older dirty looking men in scruffy clothes approached me in the street and made comments about my breasts, which have always been disproportionately large. I went home and cried. I didn't really want the attention of creepy old guys, and I began to worry about it every time I went out. I am now 28 and it's happened to me a handful of times throughout my teens and 20s. It makes me feel uncomfortable but I always have some smart comeback and I forget about it 5 minutes later. To make matters worse its always the lowest quality men. The type who are chronically unemployed and drink far too much, the type old enough to be my grandad, not that I would like it if it were men in business suits, but the type of men that approach me have a certain type of creep factor. Don't get me wrong, I would like to be attractive, but I want to be able to control the attention I receive and I don't want some of the baggage that comes with it. People say I should be flattered, but what woman is flattered when she's walking down the street and some gross wino tells her she has 'nice t*ts'? To be honest, I know some women who get this type of attention every time they go outside. Maybe because it doesn't happen to me often, emotionally I am not as good at handling it. I even know ugly women it happens to often, because of the way they dress. I know an obese girl with piercings and rainbow hair, and she always wears things like booty shorts and a low cut top. She always gets attention from random gross men. I have been out with her and I have witnessed it myself. I have also been groped in public, I have had a man try and get me to get into his car when I was pregnant. So I don't enjoy it from strangers. Do I like being 'objectified' by men I have relationships with? I guess I do, and I also do the same thing to them. We objectify each other if you want to look at it like that.

Rpwthrowawayrpw · 2016-10-10T14:23:56+00:00

I've been somewhat sexually abused (a strange old man kissed me on breast during a party but through clothes on my 18th birthday) and while it wasn't pleasant at all, it definitely wasn't nearly as traumatic as feminist media portray it. I've experienced much worse things in my life and that's not because I had a bad life but because this so called sexual abuse wasn't a great deal at all. However, just because it wasn't tramautic for me, doesn't mean it can't be tramautic for other women so I try not to be judgemental.

[deleted] · 2016-10-10T15:41:08+00:00

You don't have to be a feminist to be creeped out by the notion of some entitled fat rich dude thinking it's ok to walk up to you and "grab you by the pussy" without asking or kissing you.

Many women make an effort to get attention, but often from specific men. You dress nice to impress your captain when you go out, or look professional and attractive when you are at work, it means you will likely get glares and comments from guys you don't want attention from.

But one does not have to be a feminist to be disgusted or disturbed by Trump.

Lunaismydog · 2016-10-10T13:45:02+00:00

I have and I hated it.

Shortly after I got married I moved to a new town. I didn't have a car so consequently I walked everywhere. The shortest route in to town took me past a commercial unit.

I noticed a man who worked there looking at me a few times and took no notice. Over a few weeks this changed from him looking at me to him leering at me, to him and his friends calling and shouting to me.

It was vile, I began to feel uneasy walking that way. Every time I walked towards the unit I'd see him come out or if he wasn't out one of his friends would go rushing in (presumably to tell him I was approaching) and out he'd come to stare.

I never felt flattered. I felt scared and eventually found a longer, less convenient way to walk in to the town.

PiperZepp · 2016-10-10T14:28:01+00:00

I have natural large breasts and I'm also very thin, so I've gotten comments on the street about plastic surgery, things like men stopping me on the street seemingly needing directions or something, only to ask if my boobs are real. I've also had women actually grab my boobs to feel if they were real. I didn't like any of this, at all. I don't appreciate being stopped on the street bc I have places to go. And now I don't stop when anyone trys to get my attention so I sort of feel like I've been forced to rude to innocent stangers bc of some bad apples. My reactions to being physically grabbed or touched by strangers has usually been pretty primal/visceral disgust. There weren't any thought process behind the emotion, the revulsion and "must get away!" urge came immediately.

There is one exception: I was once felt up on a crowded bus in Istanbul, and I was taking the BC pill (but single) at the time. I really felt nothing... The man might as well have been touching my elbow instead of my breast. I actually decided to go off the pill bc of thst bc I realized if that didn't effect me at all my sexual response must really be gone.

I guess I don't find it flattering bc I am classically very attractive, even at 33 I have definitely not hit the wall yet :) So the additional attention doesn't really do anything for me, I already assume every man who sees me want to sleep with me.

Title	Have you been "objectified", as feminists say? Did you dislike it?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	2
Comments	22
Date	October 10, 2016 11:58 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/56rlkj/have_you_been_objectified_as_feminists_say_did/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/have-you-been-objectified-as-feminists-say-did-you.166963 https://theredarchive.com/post/166963

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