Hi, so my bf of 3 mos (we’ve been exclusive for 6months minus a little hiccup) has this girl that’s always around.

the hiccup was bc he kissed her for a “bit” on youtube - i followed advice from a few feminine books & told him i wasn’t going to continue the relationship if that’s going to continue.

he didn’t reply for a while & then asked me to be his gf.. odd, but i was happy. anyways, a few things with her have come up, she’s always crying & my bf comforts her (which made me feel like he’s developing this emotional relationship with her) she sleeps over at his house in the guest room & doesn’t tell me ect, i know she’s mainly there for his roommate (his roommate & her slept together a year ago but they’re just friends now) & it’s not like i can tell his roommate to not have her over (i feel like his roommate either secretly or unconsciously does things to mess up our relationship, like asking him to talk to her when she’s upset or having my bf call her, ect)

i told my bf i thought she was manipulating him.

another thing came up that bothered me $ ive only seen her once since & he deliberately kissed me in front of her.

i’m trying to figure out how to not be jealous. the whole sitsuation really bothers me but i realize i might be being sensitive. the only thing i feel like she might have over me is being more childlike (the crying, then needing protection, ect) when i’m upset i want to be alone & think but she comes over to their house & fights & i feel like it actually brings them closer?

so my question for y’all is 1. how do u not be jealous? 2. what are reasonable boundaries around this? 3. what do i do if she crosses a line, do i call it out in front of everyone or tell him or her or what is a way i can call it out in front of everyone that isn’t bitchy or bitter or controlling? 4. how can i be more feminine/ need him that isn’t gross or crying?

thank you for your advice

okay update

i talked to him about it, i told him i felt uncomfortable with her around all the time & im not going to go out of my way to avoid sitsuation that make him uncomfortable if he doesn’t do the same thing for me.. he got upset claiming it all his roomates fault & then said he’ll tell me when she comes over & invite me over or he’ll come over to my house or just leave, idk if he will actually do it, but i think he knows how serious i am now. if he just wants attention from her i don’t think he’d a man i want to be with, so we will see how this goes