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The feelings slut

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January 4, 2013
16 upvotes
http://alphagameplan.blogspot.com/2013/01/dont-be-feelings-slut.html


Post Information
Title The feelings slut
Author redpillschool
Upvotes 16
Comments 18
Date 04 January 2013 01:36 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit TheRedPill
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/174807
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/15x98z/the_feelings_slut/
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Comments

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (15 children) | Copy

This is exactly why men should never say "I love you" first.

[–]Trust77 3 points3 points [recovered] | Copy

I knew this one guy who always did that very early in his relationships. None of them lasted very long.

When asked why he's so quick to express his feelings, he said it's because he's afraid that they'll break up and separate.

Now I understand what went wrong.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Men are the gatekeepers of commitment. She made you pass all her shit tests to conquer her in the bedroom, now she gets to pass all yours to conquer you outside of the bedroom. Blue pill men forget their power because as soon as their dick gets wet they go full retard and cave to her emotional wiles.

[–]r_rships_account0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Maybe at all.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (11 children) | Copy

Eh, I don't think it's that big a deal. You definitely shouldn't blurt it out too soon, but I've had several good LTRs that included me saying it first.

[–]zionController1 point2 points  (10 children) | Copy

but I've had several good LTRs that included me saying it first.

This is the obligatory NAWALT comment that creeps up in every post.

Your describing the exception, not the rule.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (9 children) | Copy

Exceptions, plural.

My point is that never is a pretty strong word.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Obviously there is subtlety to it, and depending on how attracted she is to you, it may or may not work in your favor, but make no mistake, saying it earlier than she's expecting will put a damaging mark on her respect for you.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (7 children) | Copy

Your anecdotal evidence that happened to work out is irrelevant . Women should never sleep with a man on a first date and men should never say "I love you" first. Rare exceptions do not disprove the rules.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

OMG I must be an incredible exception, because I've also slept with future LTRs on first dates too!!

Maybe the new rule is everyone should just be like me -- that is, real -- instead of following a bunch of nonsense rules.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

I have yet to hear a good refutation of the underlying theory. Obviously "never" isn't correct, it's more of a guideline for people who have trouble feeling out situations. If you're more in tune with a woman's attraction, you can wing just about everything. Do you agree with this?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Yes, agree that you can wing everything if you're in tune with attraction. But I also believe having arbitrary rules knocks you out of tune. It sets up a situation of "oh, can't go there" and thus inhibits communication.

I think that a better way to think about these things is to interrogate your own emotions instead of just following rules.

Most guys come from a place of neediness. So when a girl shows serious interest they think they love her when in reality what they love is the validation. If they learn to be vulnerable from the beginning rather than play Alpha dog all the way up to the L word, I believe they will be more happy and more understanding of what's going on in the relationship. They also will communicate better.

That doesn't mean confess your love on the first date. If you feel that way about her, it's not love, it's something else. It does mean be willing to say what you think. Mark Manson's Models has a lot of good info on this.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

So when a girl shows serious interest they think they love her when in reality what they love is the validation.

I agree.

If they learn to be vulnerable from the beginning rather than play Alpha dog all the way up to the L word, I believe they will be more happy and more understanding of what's going on in the relationship. They also will communicate better.

I disagree that vulnerability is something you want to encourage, nor do I advocate "playing" alpha, instead of internalizing the behaviors.

I think that a better way to think about these things is to interrogate your own emotions instead of just following rules.

For sure these rules should never be applied without any discretion. I think an apt way to view the advice on this subreddit is to say to yourself, "is this action against the red pill rules?" if it is, that doesn't mean you have to categorically not do it- it means you should figure out WHY it's bad practice, consider WHY you want to do it anyway, and then make an informed decision.

I can imagine a scenario where any rule we come up with can be broken. But often, trusting our own intuition is what got us in trouble in the first place. That's why we make these guidelines, to replace intuition until you've practiced it enough to learn your own discretion.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

Ok, we have a truce. I've found vulnerability early in a relationship makes my life so much richer. Not just with women I want to date, but with everyone.

[–]zionController1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

From the female perspective, the highly indifferent man is the male version of the highly chaste woman. He is a trophy worth the hunt, the virgin for whom great sacrifices are both required and merited. To be free with ones feelings is to be sluttish and despicable.

I have known defeat by sharing feelings too early, and won great victories by withholding my feelings. I now understand why.

[–]aspiring_lobster0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Wow. I've been in this sub since the beginning, and this article made something new click. It never occurred to me the parallel between sex and commitment (although I had obviously heard the common adage that men give commitment and women give sex) and why women desire men who do not commit as readily.

[–]Kepaso1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

welcome to the red pill



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