How do you deal with girls that act really nervous when things get sexual in any way?

JackGetsIt · 2017-01-14T15:03:29+00:00

She's sounds low partner count or even virginal. You are either a high value guy that she's really nervous about because you might just be the one that parts her flower OR she's just not ready for sex or at least not with you and her female flirting powers are scaring her because of how good they are. You also need to be really aware of culture and upbringing. In Japan a women that's fucked a thousand men still acts nervous and jumpy before you fuck her because that's just the cultural norm: to ACT virginal, jumpy and scared because they think it turns men on.

The fact that you're not sure which camp you're in tells me you are probably not the Chad/alpha guy she's looking for. You should move on and fuck a girl that's not being so weird because the last thing you want is a false accusation. There are plenty of girls out there that want to ride you like a bull at the rodeo.

4TBhdd · 2017-01-14T13:07:05+00:00

A - she's just not that into you. She wants your ATTENTION. In other words, she's a girl.

B - You probably created a cognitive dissonance in her head - are you an orbiter or a sex partner. Sounds like you are made of green cheese to me.

C - Take a final shot, next time she freezes shut down completely and tell her you can't be "just friends". The ball is now in her court. And for fuck sake, drop her entirely if she balks. As in walk out the door immediately.

Life is too short to waste your time with a woman who wants validation and attention without bringing anything to the table. Self respect and discipline. Strangely, this shows her you actually have functioning balls and she may reevaluate her "relationship" with you.

blackedoutfast · 2017-01-14T15:29:10+00:00

LMR. it can be annoying but no big deal. just ease back to a level that she is cool with and stay there for a few minutes before attempting to escalate again.

also possibly just nervousness from how fast things are moving. she is probably used to doing a lot of flirting and teasing without it going anywhere because typical blue pill dudes that she usually flirts with escalate sloooooowly (or not at all). if she does the same thing with you and you escalate quickly it's unexpected and she freezes up. this happens sometimes when a girl is really into you and you are doing everything perfectly and you escalate fast. she's flirting with you and then suddenly your hand is in her panties and her brain glitches out.

meh613 · 2017-01-14T21:55:58+00:00

next her snd be done

Exactly!

realsimp · Sun Jan 15 0:07:39 2017 UTC

I am also in a virtually exact situation as OP. There is an older woman (she's 42, i'm 25) that is confident, acts very professional, dresses conservatively (never seen her wear a skirt). She's divorced but she has aged very well and looks good. She is also very religious and has traditional values.

Anyway I joke with her, i make her laugh, and she has once told me i look so manly (i've been working out lately). Sometimes I will playfully push her and she'll smile and laugh. However other times, she goes into "full lockdown mode", as OP stated. But soon later, she'll be happy to see me and say hi with a smile, like everything's back to normal. My flirting is consistent but her reaction seems to be inconsistent.

Not sure what to make of this.

theredpill22 · 2017-01-15T00:35:59+00:00

I live with a girl like this.

She sits beside me on the couch when there's a group of like 5-6 people around, I'm sitting in the middle of the room, cracking jokes and generally just enjoying myself with my bros, she's really quiet and barely says anything. She laughs at any joke I make, she gradually moves closer to me until her thigh is pressing against mine, catch her staring at me a few times. I pretty much ignore her as I'm having a lot of fun and one of my good friends is just back from the US after 6 months, so most of my attention is spent talking to him.

I don't really want to escalate with her even though she is attractive because I live with her and that's going to get messy, for sure.

I'm fine in groups, I'm well liked and probably come across as a social butterfly / alpha male due to my height, looks, academic and athletic success but when it gets down to it I'm a weird dude who like to be on his own a lot, the reason why I'm successful is that I've sacrificed a lot of social time to study more and hit the gym more, being elite in those areas takes sacrifice, you have to outwork the others. I'm weird in that I can sacrifice that and still live a fairly sane and happy life.

Anyway, back to the point. The next day, she just so happens to leave her room a second or two after I do. We start talking and she starts ranting about her work, looking for my opinion on something that happened. Going on and on, boring me to tears. I notice that she's talking a lot faster than usual, but other than that, no signs of nervousness. So I make some excuse to get closer to her, trying to make eye contact with her, and she still won't stop talking about something that happened at work. Eventually I kind of start laughing to myself, tell her I got lost midway through and that I don't really want to hear it again, tell her I have to go. She says wait and tries to explain more, I say no seriously, ring B or F (her orbiters) and ask them. She says I'm "so mean" and that she'll probably go to her room and try figure it out herself.

I don't know, man. She shows all the signs of liking me yet seems to want to make me her orbiter whenever we are alone. I probably failed a shit test earlier on (naturally, I have to spend a decent amount of time around her, inevitably youre going to have moments of weakness) so now she's trying to figure me out again.

The whole thing is a mess and there's no way I'm living with an attractive woman again if I have a choice. I don't have the option of escalating aggressively because living with her means a rejection will make things very awkward.

I have thought about inviting her out for a drink or something though. I guess you need to invest some bit of time into a woman before she just drops her panties for you. Makes me feel like a bit of a cuck though, that I have to bring her out and I can't just seal the deal in the house.

FlexGunship · 2017-01-14T16:51:37+00:00

Sounds like she's a newbie or has a history of abuse.

It'll be fine. Don't waste your time, but if it works out she'll probably turn into a sex puddle in your bed.

Title	How do you deal with girls that act really nervous when things get sexual in any way?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	10
Comments	14
Date	January 14, 2017 12:47 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/5nx9x7/how_do_you_deal_with_girls_that_act_really/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-do-you-deal-with-girls-that-act-really-nervous.182078 https://theredarchive.com/post/182078

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