How does a guy who has been a misfit most of his life fit in with most others and have that social circle?

sunkindonut149 · 2016-12-22T21:32:19+00:00

What are your special interests? I found that I fit in in (no lie) the emo / metal scene and i'm in my early 30s. Like playing music not just listening to it.

VigilantRedRooster · 2016-12-23T04:42:41+00:00

Check the self-improvement section of our sidebar ---->

A few relevant posts for you linked there.

walruskingofsweden · 2016-12-22T22:17:16+00:00

Try changing your habits. If your current habits have made you a misfit, try changing them and maybe you'll have better results. It's not gonna happen overnight. Stop fapping, get some hobbies like hiking, skiing or learn an instrument. Lift weights. Then maybe if you make one new friend through those new hobbies, you'll meet another through him, and another, and so forth.

blackedoutfast · 2016-12-22T22:48:41+00:00

be cool and interesting and fun to be around. get off the computer and go out into the real world. start talking to random strangers. if you do get along with them then start meeting up and doing fun shit. keep repeating this process until you have a large social circle that does a lot of fun activities.

SpinPlates · 2016-12-23T01:04:32+00:00

You need a hobby!!

I recommend motorcycles.

[deleted] · 2016-12-23T01:52:20+00:00

Like what others are saying. Do what you like. Find other people that like doing the same things. I have made a shit ton of friends just from music fests/edm/concerts shows.

mrpoopistan · 2016-12-23T05:28:11+00:00

Your options . . .

Roll solo. Take a serious commitment to frame, but if you can hold your own rolling solo people will find you interesting. Works better for those of high SMV -- there is simply a limit at which you're an ugly loner.
Insinuate yourself into groups. People in club and bar settings like to bullshit. Overhear a conversation and comment. Go from there. Talk to the DJ, the sound guys, the bartenders, the shot girls, the bouncers, etc. if there's no one else to talk to. Initiate conversations until one sticks.
Go where the misfits are. In terms of sexualized club settings, this means finding the kink community where you live. You might also find a few other scenes depending on what the vibe is in your area.

I'm someone who's best described as misfit-adjacent. Very tech savvy, but not a goth type or anything like that. I dress well and easily fit in at high-end clubs, but at the end of the day I like weird people.

I use all three approaches I just listed, depending on my mood. When I'm feeling especially distant, I roll solo. When I'm feeling bored and just want to toy around, I'll go the boring white girl club. When I just want to chill I'll find a place that's a bit more black and hispanic. When I want to be among the fuckups and outcasts, there are two kink-friendly clubs where I have a decent circle of friends (sometimes a weekend of watching a pain slut getting whipped is all it takes to fire the engine up).

I find that the more outsider-ish people are, the more variety they tend to need. One scene won't get it done, and there are definitely times when you need to get the fuck away from the sluts and the squares and be among your fellow weirdos.

[deleted] · 2016-12-23T00:31:25+00:00

[permanently deleted]

[deleted] · 2016-12-22T23:38:43+00:00

Stop asking the same fucking question you autist

Title	How does a guy who has been a misfit most of his life fit in with most others and have that social circle?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	8
Comments	12
Date	December 22, 2016 8:29 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/5jsu2f/how_does_a_guy_who_has_been_a_misfit_most_of_his/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-does-a-guy-who-has-been-a-misfit-most-of-his.182512 https://theredarchive.com/post/182512

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