New to TRP. Need advice about a girl who may be toying with me.

Schveen15 · 2016-06-03T18:11:33+00:00

Sounds like she's toying with you: if she wanted to be with you, she would've gone ahead and been with you.

If you like her and wanna be with her and she doesn't wanna be with you, go radio silent. Make it clear to her that you two are either aiming to be something or you are acquaintances (with no in-betweens).

Also, for future reference when a chick is interested in you and hinting at it, close the deal (sex) quickly and don't be hesitant: she will pick up on your hesitancy and hesitancy is unattractive

RedditAdminsSuck_88 · 2016-06-03T18:18:49+00:00

I've been crushing on a girl in my class since the last year but was hesitant about making a move.

It's clear you have oneitis. The mindest you need to have is "I don't give a fuck" mode. Outcome independence.

I made the mistake of asking her out over texts

Huge mistake. Text for logistics only. Anything else should be done in person. Especially asking someone out. Asking someone out over text or a facebook message or anything that isn't verbal comes across as weak and cowardly, and is giving her all of the power. By showing weakness and cowardice she knows you are thirsty and are outcome dependent.

She replied that she has a crush on me too but doesn't see a future with me. Even after this, she kept expressing how she liked me and how I was a great guy. Immediately followed by how she feels strongly about me. Again followed by stating that we can't be together.

She sees you as a "good guy", aka a beta. You don't give her the tingles. She is not attracted to you, only the idea of you. She wants your personal qualities, but in the body of someone she is physically attracted to. She feels guilty about this, which is why she is hamstering with you. Watch what they do, not what they say. In this case she is saying she likes you, but is not fucking you. Translation: She isn't attracted

what is probably going on inside her head?

She is trying to rope you in as an orbiter, so you can shower her with validation, gifts, companionship when she needs it, and for you to be an emotional tampon when she needs it. She is dropping the "I like you but I can't be with you" because she is trying to have her cake and eat it to. She wants your provider qualities without having to commit, so she is hoping you orbit her.

Are you lifting?

TheRedStoic · 2016-06-03T18:49:45+00:00

Just remember, a girl who wants you will move mountains to get you. Other than that you're a toy as much as she is to you.

She wouldn't have any trouble committing or working for Brad Pit, so she doesn't want you enough. Move on, soft next, let her stew, maybe it'll change but don't count on it.

Jakei34 · 2016-06-03T19:04:57+00:00

SIDEBAR SIDEBAR!!!!!!!!!!

huge_gap · 2016-06-03T20:09:17+00:00

She wants you as a beta orbiter: an emotional tampon and back-up boyfriend whenever she needs. She's probably getting fucked by another dude who is more exciting but she'd like to string you along as backup.

Escalate with her in person until kissing and sex. If she denies you despite overcoming her Anti-slut defense then soft next.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2016-06-03T23:15:26+00:00

but doesn't see a future with me.

"There won't be a future with me if you don't go out with me first."

verily_rp · 2016-06-04T04:14:24+00:00

It's bait. She wants you as a beta orbiter.

melliescomingover · 2016-06-05T01:24:06+00:00

Sounds like you already missed the boat.

I promise you that if a woman sees you as an Alpha, she will drop everything and plan her entire life around you. Women's convictions are fragile and fickle and change at the first sign of tingles.

You're the prize here, not her. She's treating you as a potential beta orbiter, which is an insult. You failed to prove her wrong, you failed to prove your alpha status or take the lead, now your beta status is confirmed in her eyes. Next her. If you do get the chance, pump and dump, ignore her afterwards, revel in her tears, show her who's in control. You'll always be the one who got away.

Title	New to TRP. Need advice about a girl who may be toying with me.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	6
Comments	13
Date	June 3, 2016 5:54 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/4me4g3/new_to_trp_need_advice_about_a_girl_who_may_be/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/new-to-trp-need-advice-about-a-girl-who-may-be.185379 https://theredarchive.com/post/185379

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