Last year, about Dec 2013 - Jan 2014 I hit rock bottom. Over a period of a month and a half, I:

*A) finally had sex for the first time, only to not be able to get my dick up.

*B) got into a fight, breaking my glasses.

*C) my coworker finally told me "you are a loser" to my face.

*D) had my best friend of 8 years sleep with my fucking mom.

I wish I was joking about that last one. Anyways, I was driven to TRP after askmen thought I was making this shit up, and subsequently banned me after posting on TRP. I posted on TRP, and was immediately told to read the sidebar and lurk, as well as many people telling me that my friend did a good job. Fuck, I hate my mom. It was pretty good advice in terms of getting me to get off my ass and do shit. I went full on monk mode; I just finished my first year long membership at the gym, 145lbs-180lbs at 6'0", got a promotion and 50% raise at work in last May, took self pased classes to upgrade HS courses I didn't give a fuck about back then. I also recently joined a band, and am playing about 1 show month until September. For problem A, I realized I had to quit watching porn all the time; it's a once a week thing now. Things are going much better, but I still hate myself.

I hate that I wasted years of my life. From about 16-20, all of it, just fucking wasted it playing guitar and surfing the internet. The band is cool, but it's getting hard to care; I wish I made more friends in HS, and tried to go out with more girls. I still have troubles with girls. They don't give a shit about me, and I'm probably gonna hire an escort just to actually get laid before I turn 22. They think I'm boring. They know I'm actually a loser, even if things are starting to turn around. My plan is to get an mech engineering degree, which I have the ability and resources to get, and use it to get a better position in my company. Ill be fucking 28-30 before I have the degree, as I need to go part time; Ive missed out on high school, I'm gonna miss out on being a young adult too.

What the fuck can I do? I'm stuck in an office every weekday; I don't go to school, and I go to band practice and my brothers to hang out. How can I meet girls? Online dating sucks, I am literally a "new message" notification to all these chicks, and the few that actually agreed to meet me were either gross (jacked, yellow stained teeth) or way too fat for me to be interested in just fucking them. Are my standards too high? I want kids one day, but I'm sure not gonna be some chump who settles for some post wall cunt looking for an easy out. Am I being unrealistic?

This is convoluted as fuck. If it makes any sense, any direction would be awesome, I'm mostly on my own at this point.