How do you handle rejection?

PsychoticMouse · 2014-04-09T22:07:46+00:00

I have a gorgeous RPW friend who uses OKCupid and a lot of the men she meets go out with her a few times then give weird excuses about commitment then disappear

Eh, when meeting men online, keep in mind that most of them will not be an alpha or "RP" man. They will hardly ever initiate anything, and if they do, will quickly cancel as to protect their own ego. Or sometimes they just decided they didn't like you, which is fine, out of 7 billion people in the world, a few are bound to not like you! Its normal. You could be the ripest peach in the bunch, but there will still be somebody who prefers strawberries.

Advice;

Work on your own self esteem.
Raise your "SMV".
Workout, stay fit
Eat healthy
Learn some feminine skills! May I direct you to /r/Sewing, /r/WildWhittlers, and /r/Knitting? You are going to want to be able to offer your future man some skills besides just a great lay.

Keep in mind that if anything, you will be rejecting them. As a rpw, you're going to be your lovely, awesome, and friendly self. A RP man will approach YOU! You just have to make sure you are actively working to attract the type of man you are interested in. :)

Ceylonorangetea · 2014-04-10T00:31:17+00:00

Wine!

darkcannoli · 2014-04-10T00:30:17+00:00

Don't put yourself out there and chocolate. :)

snowandbaggypants · 2014-04-11T06:01:49+00:00

To be honest, the more times you experience a slight rejection or fade away, the easier it gets. Online dating exposes you to this and I know it's scary but for me it's been a good thing! Each time I read the signs of a guy losing interest or fading off, I forget about him and move on. But when I do that, I closely examine myself and my actions for how I could be a better woman.

This has made it infinitely easier for me when dating because I'm constantly acknowledging and working on my faults. Rejection keeps you on your toes! Now I feel like I am presenting a much better version of myself than I was say, a year ago. I've had less rejection lately, but when it does happen, it hurts a lot less because I know I'm being feminine, pretty, fit, caring, etc. Yes it still stings a bit, but it's just more motivation for me to keep trying and keep improving. I'm definitely very sensitive and felt the same as you about rejection, so I totally understand. But the mindset I described above has really helped me!

2014-04-09T22:09:09+00:00

[permanently deleted]

2014-04-10T01:35:35+00:00

I've never approached, so I can't really tell you how I personally handle rejection.

The primary thing you have to remember is that rejection will happen. It's inevitable to some degree.

Boost your SMV and don't hate yourself. Find your faults and fix those. If a man still doesn't like you, well, that may be his personal preferences getting in the way. For the most part, you should have much less trouble with rejection unless you're trying way outside of your league.

Bakerofpie · 2014-04-10T12:18:18+00:00

I have never been outright "rejected," though there have been a handful of men who we decided mutually that we wouldn't be a good fit romantically. These things happen. Sometimes two people just aren't compatible. If you meet a great guy but don't end up with them, it doesn't necessarily mean you have low value.

I am still friends with all but one of the worthwhile men (who actually broke up with me and a day later I figured out he had converted to religion which is an absolute, hands down, not up for discussion, no wiggle room deal breaker for me). This doesn't seem to be the case for most women - if it doesn't work out they don't really want the guy sticking around in any other capacity. I'm just saying that not being compatible for a LTR doesn't mean you suck. The guy may really like you, just not in that way. Or, he may just not like you at all, and that's okay, because not everyone will. Take the most gorgeous and feminine woman on the planet and there's going to be men who are not remotely interested in the long term.

I would also like to note that it's likely I've never been rejected because I almost always went for men who were quite clearly below me in SMV and were extremely lucky to have me around in the first place. That is obviously not a route you want to take if you're already looking for marriage.

Butimdifferent · 2014-04-09T22:03:19+00:00

There are a few things you have to get over first before you should continue.

"I grew up learning any attractive, valuable woman will have absolutely no romantic rejection at all."

This is not reality. This is not reality. This is not reality.

Even beautiful women will get rejected by men. Be thankful for rejection from a man as it allows you to experience honesty and to reflect on your faults which may have caused the rejection

"I have a gorgeous RPW friend who uses OKCupid and a lot of the men she meets go out with her a few times then give weird excuses about commitment then disappear."

Two parts.

Who are you to judge what makes your friend a RPW if, at the very least, you are not there yourself?

You are not your friend. Do not date vicariously through her. Have your own experiences and form your own opinions!

It sounds like you already believe your SMV is low and you already hate yourself...so not facing rejection is your way of avoiding improving yourself. "I am already so awesome that I can't understand why anybody wouldn't want me! Also, my poop never smells"

Title	How do you handle rejection?
Author	carrotcake4
Upvotes	3
Comments	16
Date	April 9, 2014 9:42 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/22n3t1/how_do_you_handle_rejection/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/how-do-you-handle-rejection.197131 https://theredarchive.com/post/197131

Comments