How do I mend my LTR?

cegh · 2015-03-05T09:05:36+00:00

That is a lot of hours in my opinion to be working. Is that because you have your own business or you are working your way up the career ladder? Don't be the guy who spends 20 hours working who doesn't get paid for all those hours and no-one sees the work you've done.

I doubt you can even make this work if you can't sacrifice some of your time to what I'm about to suggest.

You need to instil dread that the BluepillProfessor wrote about (stages of dread).

You can also carry out 'short' term dread and 'long' term dread.

Short term dread: Doing something new that you haven't done before. This instils dread because people by nature have habits. Breaking those habits makes the other person wonder if they 'found' someone else they found attractive.

The activity you do can affect the dread you give her. For example:

Long Term Dread:

Weights: Low-Medium-High Dread (The best long term dread of all. It starts off low because you have to stick to it and it takes time to look better. BUT when you do start looking better, your SMV increases a lot.)
Starting a sports activity: The type of sport affects your SMV IE football is high SMV and ping pong is low. BUT even a low activity increases your SMV
Doing an activity other than sports: Volunteering, Sing in a band, play a guitar, part of a cinema/animie group.
Career: Having a goal in life and working towards it no matter what instils dread. Women know the more a man makes the more women will be after that money.

The above are activities that will take months to increase your SMV but actually 'starting' any of them will increase your SMV. Also, the more you do, the higher your SMV.

You can work on short term dread too. This increase in your SMV is temporary but raises SMV over the long term if you continue to do it.

Short Term Dread (Some you can control, others you can't):

Women flirting with you infront of your girlfriend.
Going out with LTR that is interesting so she can brag to her friends how you took her X and did Y together, with all the emotions.
Surprises: After a meal or going out, start driving home but then go a different place where it's private and initiate blowjob/handjob/ kissing (Unfortunately, I don't know if this works if your SMV is lower than hers, but it works miracles if your SMV is higher)
Winning: When someone wins at anything, it gives them high value automatic bragging rights. Won £10 at lottery, won at winning bingo, won a competition, won a game of pool. If you win with something higher value ie a swimming competition 2 years ago, let your girlfriend know. It gives her bragging rights to brag about you to her friends.
Popularity: Women love to be centre of attention. The more people you know the higher chance she gets to be the centre of attention. IE you have youtube channel or 10,000 subscribers, she gets bragging rights because you are popular, she will figure out how she can be apart of it and receive the attention.
The easiest to perform, left til last: Buy some new clothes, shoes, jackets, get a haircut and buy some new cologne.

Short and Long Term Dread:

Learn how to pass shit tests: agree and amplify. This is your most powerful weapon to start with to cause dread. It demonstrates you are higher value than her because you don't care what she says and it doesn't affect your emotional state.
Tease your girlfriend. Also demonstrates higher value than her and makes you appear fun.
Be Strong (Dominant). Women like a strong man, even if your a stick man/fat. So when you are about to have sex or you are going to kiss her. Move her to the wall and kiss her. Push her on the bed.

I recommend doing 1 thing out the list and add to it when you feel she isn't surprised anymore. Depends on the activity. IE if you start weights you might want to wait 1 month before buying new clothes. But if you buy new clothes, it might be best to wait 2 weeks to start another listed.

TrainingTheBrain · 2015-03-05T12:05:40+00:00

this is partially because I'm a workaholic and I enjoy just sitting in a room for 20 hours and getting something productive done.

Don't justify failure.

You're in Married Red Pill so most of us would prefer to fix the relationship as opposed to choosing to "drop the oneitis and start spinning plates". I'd besurprised if you got that answer from anyone here.

With that said, You already know exactly what you need to do, you just want us to say it for you, so we will, but understand that you know the answer and even though it is difficult to digest, you have to accept it.

You are not an 'Alpha' or reaching your potential and filling your role as a Man, that is a fact. Embrace it, wrap your arms around it, and accept that the failure is entirely yours and it is going to take hard work and self discipline to improve your situation.

Get back into the gym. This will help you improve your physical appearance, stamina in the bed, strength, and confidence. Also, it is a form of passive dread. What I mean by that is by going to the gym you are away from your lady and are in a place where fit 'TightBodies' are walking around. Your lady knows that and whether she admits it at first or later on, she will eventually talk about your improved physical appearance ad the girls at the gym.

Active dread, show her while you're out that you can make the waitress smile, make her friends envious, and that she needs to recognize she is not your entire journey but merely a part of it.

You're a 'workaholic', well so is the President, Arnold S., Elon Musk, etc. and those guys find time to take care of their physical and mental health so you can too.

Implement these things and I'm sure you will see improvement immediately and it will only grow with time.

strategos_autokrator · 2015-03-05T09:55:01+00:00

Your post is essentially the big question everyone comes here to work on, with no concrete details or specifics. So, guess what? You get a general answer in turn.

What have you read from the guide on the sidebar? Your questions are broad, but luckily, that guide has many books to break down the issues into manageable things.

theultmatecad · 2015-03-05T12:05:33+00:00

Read the sidebar here. Lurk a few weeks and then ask your question again. And start lifting.

Your efforts to improve things have to be more than posting a Stupid question to strangers on the net then going back to the same life that fucked things up in the first place

whinemoreplease · 2015-03-05T05:45:36+00:00

So you've basically completely tossed out abundance mentality and core red pill principles, eh? Given that, there really isn't all that much to tell you, imho. Maybe read the sidebar and start there.

Alternatively, figure out how to get your work life balance in check. I wouldn't put too much effort into someone who I felt was neglecting me either.

BluepillProfessor · 2015-03-05T05:46:21+00:00

You don't hear spinning plates much on MRP as that was one of the reasons this sub was created.

However, the credible threat of plate spinning is the biggest tool you have (aka Dread) which mean that you COULD spin plates if you chose but you choose instead to be with your LTR.

Search by my name for my post on Dread a few months back.

Then read the books on the sidebar. For reviving a low sex situation I think that is "Scenario 1" and you should read MMSL and MAP ASAP. Start in on MRP's Wiki (at the top line to the left of your name) and then go to TRP's sidebar posts- especially on Shit Tests.

That's the short term.

For the long term, you need to MAP- lift, improve, start responding to her Shit Tests appropriately, Initiate Stop being a bitch, realize your value is far higher than your LTR's value, man up, take charge, lead. Then Instigate, Isolate, Escalate...and fuck her good.

Title	How do I mend my LTR?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	1
Comments	7
Date	March 5, 2015 5:33 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MarriedRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/2xzstf/how_do_i_mend_my_ltr/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MarriedRedPill/how-do-i-mend-my-ltr.202408 https://theredarchive.com/post/202408

Comments