What do Women Want?

MorpheusGodOfDreams · 2015-08-10T05:20:17+00:00

this just proves that women have absolutely no idea what they want.

[deleted] · 2015-08-09T21:52:48+00:00

When you post an article at least summarize it or quote sections for discussion:

The men, on average, responded genitally in what Chivers terms “category specific” ways. Males who identified themselves as straight swelled while gazing at heterosexual or lesbian sex and while watching the masturbating and exercising women. They were mostly unmoved when the screen displayed only men.

Gay males were aroused in the opposite categorical pattern. Any expectation that the animal sex would speak to something primitive within the men seemed to be mistaken; neither straights nor gays were stirred by the bonobos.

And for the male participants, the subjective ratings on the keypad matched the readings of the plethysmograph. The men’s minds and genitals were in agreement.

women:

All was different with the women. No matter what their self-proclaimed sexual orientation, they showed, on the whole, strong and swift genital arousal when the screen offered men with men, women with women and women with men.

They responded objectively much more to the exercising woman than to the strolling man, and their blood flow rose quickly — and markedly, though to a lesser degree than during all the human scenes except the footage of the ambling, strapping man — as they watched the apes. And with the women, especially the straight women, mind and genitals seemed scarcely to belong to the same person. The readings from the plethysmograph and the keypad weren’t in much accord.

During shots of lesbian coupling, heterosexual women reported less excitement than their vaginas indicated; watching gay men, they reported a great deal less; and viewing heterosexual intercourse, they reported much more. Among the lesbian volunteers, the two readings converged when women appeared on the screen.

But when the films featured only men, the lesbians reported less engagement than the plethysmograph recorded. Whether straight or gay, the women claimed almost no arousal whatsoever while staring at the bonobos.

lurfly · 2015-08-09T21:55:14+00:00

That was so long I don't even know where to start with this comment. Really interesting, a few studies I hadn't read about before.

The thing that resonates most with me is that mental arousal and physical arousal are two separate things that don't often align.

I've been begging desperately for penetration only to find that I am not physically aroused and it is painful. I've been enjoying foreplay but not feeling particularly aroused, then suddenly realize I'm literally dripping wet. Baffling.

Female sexuality absolutely exists on a spectrum. I really like the idea that physical arousal in response to sexual stimuli helped to protect women and made it more likely for their offspring to survive. Helps to explain the divide between mental arousal and physical arousal and explains the wide array of stimuli that induce arousal in women.

grendalor · 2015-08-10T13:43:49+00:00

One of my takeaways from this article, when it was first published back in 2009, is that the culture's general hatred of male sexuality as "objectifying" is really simply straight up shaming of normal male sexuality.

Men are aroused by the object of their desire -- as the article confirms. They are not aroused by the response of the object, but by the object itself. This is normal male sexuality, and it is the same for gay men as it is for straight men, the difference being who the object is.

Women, by contrast, as it explains in the article, are aroused by the arousal of the person whom they want to desire them. It's a more self-focused arousal, because it basically means that they are aroused by being the object of the other's desire (provided, again, that they want the other to desire them in the first place).

If one is inclined to describe the male-typical form of arousal as "objectifying", then one could just as easily describe the female form of arousal as "solipsistic". It's not very nice, is it? Yet this is exactly what is done with male sexuality in our culture. While a more balanced set of descriptors (initator/responder, etc.) could be used, "objectification" is just too good sweet to be passed up by the culture -- not only is it true (the male arousal is aroused by its object, so in that sense is objectifying regardless of the response of the object), but it's also a perfect way to shame something that is inherent in male sexuality itself. A core part of the war on men and male sexuality that is being waged in our culture on a daily basis.

SirNemesis · 2015-08-10T00:06:04+00:00

Wazzup is that you?

nomdplume · 2015-08-11T18:53:35+00:00

I wish this thread had garnered more attention.

I don't know how anyone can read this and still think, "Oh no, men and women (and their respective sexualities) aren't different at all. We all just want the same things."

If this doesn't confirm sexual dimorphism, what does? I mean, this is an actual study, which should placate all the BPers who won't consider anything that doesn't come from an academic.

And it's articles like this that made me think that the "Red Pill" model of sexual dynamics was fairly uncontroversial to anyone who has studied sexual dynamics.

I've read all kinds of material like this. It wasn't until I saw the BP reactions to these sorts of ideas that I realized that my way of seeing sexual dynamics differs greatly from a lot of the population. I'm still not sure why...

redmachines · 2015-08-09T21:29:46+00:00

Good stuff. Three things

Although I wish they had used attractive people and unattractive people to see how women reacted instead of apes.

Also the testosterone level is something to note because obesity is linked to high estrogen and not enough T. So I guess men should beware of going after a chubby, because they may disappoint.

Lastly, it is unfair that even in the bedroom, it will always be about what you (the man) can do for her and not the other way around.

rage_post · 2015-08-11T18:36:28+00:00

Well, given that there are 3.5 billion of them, probably a whole bunch of different things.

Title	What do Women Want?
Author	ArrantPariah
Upvotes	3
Comments	16
Date	August 9, 2015 8:51 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/3gdxch/what_do_women_want/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-do-women-want.280400 https://theredarchive.com/post/280400

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