How much is a "normal" number of sexual partners?

koukol · 2013-11-20T09:30:43+00:00

No.

I think that TRP comes from a biased place, as the majority of them appear to be interested in one night stands, FWB situations, and lots of casual sex with a number of different women. Obviously, if you are a man who is trying to have lots of casual sex, who spends a not insignificant amount of time talking to other men who are also interested in casual sex, and who has a decent number of female acquaintances who also indulge in casual sex, you're gonna assume that the "average" number for the population will be high.

In reality, there are large numbers of people who only have one or two sexual partners in their lifetimes. Nuns exist, virgin brides exist, people who put a very high value on sexual intimacy exist, but these people do not post to TRP. TRP in itself is a biased sample because the people there are striving for a high number of sexual partners. They're not likely to target women who have a deliberately low partner count, either.

There's also the added bonus that if a woman claims to have a low partner count, TRP will accuse her of lying, or "hamstering" and saying that certain things don't count, etc. So even if a group of women with very low partner counts did come to TRP, they would be accused of being dishonest. So their viewpoint is just solidified.

Shadow_Nirvana · 2013-11-20T19:37:59+00:00

[permanently deleted]

RobotPartsCorp · 2013-11-20T12:14:32+00:00

It depends if you are naturally monogamous, serially monogamous or not. So, no. If i had to say a number, I would say 1,567 is too much. Yep.

Canned_Wine199 · 2013-11-20T12:42:51+00:00

I kind of wanted to start a post asking number of partners, in relation to user's position on TRP/Opinions on male and female sexuality, but I didn't think it would go anywhere good.

I'm strongly of the opinion number of sexual partners has a lot to do with the environment you're in, someone who's considered promiscuous in a small town could have had 20 partners by age 25, whereas a person who's 25 who has been with 20 partners in a metropolitan area would be seen as pretty normal by most.

I'm also curious to know what social forces in New Zealand make women more likely to pursue men and list higher partner counts than them? I've met maybe 3 women from New Zealand, two of them I guess I'd describe as a little more flirty with me than usual but nothing that would stand out if I didn't know about New Zealand's particular dating behaviors...

TRP_ · 2013-11-20T13:35:25+00:00

The current median according to the CDC for the 25-44 age bracket is 4 for women and 6 for men. On a phone so can't source a link atm.

LadyLumen · 2013-11-26T18:47:54+00:00

I think television gives the impression that people have a high sexual partner average, because people on sitcoms are always in and out of different relationships and sleeping with various folks.

I think each character on Seinfeld has slept with an average of 80-100 people, and George has slept with the most!

For the average person, I think any number below 10 is good, because all things are good in moderation. Sleeping too much, eating too much, drinking too much are all bad things. In addition, fucking around too much, IMO, is also bad for both men and women. No matter how much protection you use or how safe you try to be, each new person you sleep with is going to open you up to some new kind of danger: warts on the thighs, general skin diseases, rape, pregnancy, abuse, etc. One of the worst things about 3rd wave Feminism, IMO, is the idea that sleeping around is empowering. This is gross negligence on the part of Feminists for the safety of young women. In the real world, not everyone has good intentions. Sleeping around to "empower" yourself can take you into some very dark situations - such as being drugged, raped, beaten, knocked up and given a disease. Men are more likely to avoid these sorts of dangerous situations simply because it is harder to drug/get them drunk, and they are (usually, but not always) physically strong enough to avoid being overpowered by a female stranger. However, even men can be taken advantage of sexually.

I think sleeping with a large number of people, for both men and women, changes a persons ability to be intimate with other people. Most of the people I've known who fucked around a lot in their teens and twenties ended up regretting it .The women I've talked to regretted it the most, but that's probably due to social pressures. Yet I've even talked to men who regretted sleeping around and letting the girl they loved slip away so that they could "sow their wild oats."

I think the best thing to do is sleep around with maybe a handful of people you trust when you're young, just to experiment and figure out what you like, and then find someone in your mid to late twenties that you can stay monogamous with. Personally, I think getting some prior sexual experience before marriage is better than none, so that way you can gain more confidence and knowledge about sexuality - in addition to satisfying your curiousity. The ideal of marrying a pure virgin isn't always as good as it sounds. Many of these women can end up resentful and embarassed by the normal sexual requirements of a marriage, because they've been told their whole lives that sex is bad. The people I know who got married too young, before they got a lot of sexual experience, ended up regretting it and having sexual affairs later.

So balance is good IMO.

Title	How much is a "normal" number of sexual partners?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	4
Comments	24
Date	November 20, 2013 7:30 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1r1o09/how_much_is_a_normal_number_of_sexual_partners/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-much-is-a-normal-number-of-sexual-partners.286577 https://theredarchive.com/post/286577

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