I still can't make friends. How to stop brain fog and always have something to say?

Shadows1455 · 2019-10-07T18:52:30+00:00

You feel like you have to win them over so you're bar of saying something is very high. You don't, you're already good enough, they already like you.

Vicco_ · 2019-10-07T18:56:03+00:00

When I'm talking with people, most of the time I'd just say "hmm" "uhuh" "nice" etc. Most of the time it's because I can't relate to wtf they're saying.

Perhaps you're in your head too much trying to think of what to say rather than listening to what they're trying to convey.

If that's the case, I'd try to understand where they're getting at or the motivation behind why they're saying it. So you can just ask questions to better understand. Be genuinely interested. Pretend as if he knows something that you don't.

Remember that and a conversation will just flow.

Also, silence in many cases is the better option. You don't gotta frame silence as being retarded.

Gl

red_philosopher · 2019-10-07T19:09:51+00:00

You might want to cut back on video games and actually spend more time doing things that aren't video games. Unless all of your friends play videogames constantly, you won't have much to talk about because that's all you do.

Also, you may have mild ADHD. Which should be treated.

YouWannaPutMoneyOnIt · 2019-10-07T20:15:23+00:00

Eat, sleep, lift

Get the basics then let’s see if problems persist, IF they do then let’s talk

Rodent9 · 2019-10-07T23:00:32+00:00

Brain fog - stop jerking off.

Fusionnn · 2019-10-07T21:10:51+00:00

It's easy become a more interesting person, listen to podcasts so you have a vast array of knowledge so that you can interject an opinion or a thought here and there. Be relatable.

IcyBear7 · 2019-10-08T00:29:29+00:00

Bruh, as someone who's had your issues before and got better this is what you actually do: as someone else has said, you have to diversify your interests and get with the times on current events, pop culture, fun hobbies etc.

You know how people actually connect? through similarities. I've got a few friends i got a long great with cause we loved watching game of thrones together back when it wasnt trash.

I made other friends from playing league of legends together, other friends from being interested in food hopping, wine tasting, doing 5k's, learning to invest financially, owning a cat, etc

if all you do is lift and play video games, the only people you'll ever meet are people who do teh same. Which can be fine but at least TRY to become more well rounded

MR_SKINNYPENIS69 · 2019-10-08T06:09:05+00:00

Hobbies. Men bond over mutual interests. That's your key.

Women bond over you talking about their opinions of people and their hopes and dreams. Read carefully: about their opinions and hopes and dreams. That's your key there.

Men care about things and activities; women care about people.

If youre the kind of person who isn't great at or doesn't enjoy talking about himself then learn to ask the right questions at the right moments. I've been one of those people my whole life and so I've gotten really good at doing this to keep conversations going and it's helped me get a lot of women in the past. I'm not so good at talking to men, because with men you have to trade stories and information to keep one another entertained and I'm much more of a listener so men generally prefer to talk to a bro who will entertain them than to me.

spacemanu · 2019-10-07T23:09:05+00:00

Stop jerking off for 15 days.

That's it.

Futhermucker83 · 2019-10-07T21:36:16+00:00

Get some interests, have some experiences, read some shit, get some knowledge. Then you will have shit to say.

[deleted] · 2019-10-08T11:02:03+00:00

Take care of your diet. Up the fats, especially animal fats. Down the carbs and sugars.

baron_vladimir · 2019-10-08T11:04:31+00:00

For the past year or so I've been getting back to what I've always been -- the center of attention. I'm constantly making jokes and making everyone laugh (not like a clown, mind you). People love me being there and I'm constantly invited to parties, birthdays and social events.

Over the past 8 years I was in a relationship and had some other pretty rough things happen to me during that time and I had become pretty introverted.

What worked for me was just start talking shit, whatever crossed my mind, I would say it no matter people's reaction. Eventually I realized nobody actually gave a fuck about what I said so I could basically say anything.

Over the past few months I have been fine-tuning things to actually only communicate what I want, but in my opinion that feeling of freedom to say anything is an absolute must to win people over. Everyone seems to enjoy that I'm not actively trying to win them over, I'm just being myself, regardless who's next to me.

smartfunction30 · 2019-10-07T23:22:49+00:00

I get along with maybe 1/3 of people I meet. I'm probably just on a different wavelength.

I dunno. Do you want to get along with everyone or just people you flow with?

A1M8E7 · 2019-10-08T01:50:52+00:00

I can relate to this. Unfortunately the only thing that’s worked to fix it is trying vyvanse. Maybe I have a form of ADD or something, I don’t know, but I don’t condone stimulants. Extreme potential for addiction.

The stereotype of stimheads is that they’re egomaniacs and they talk too much. People like us just appear normal though. Works wonders for the mood and motivation and you feel like you can be who you want to be and more outcome independent/ less shy.

thedonuts352 · 2019-10-07T23:17:33+00:00

I say don’t try to make friends. You probably aren’t the type to naturally connect with everyone and that’s fucking fine. I’m the same way. Just go about your business and you’ll make connections with people you actually have reasons to connect with. Maybe that won’t be very many people. Fine, it is what it is. Embrace who you are and adjust to not having that many friends if that’s how your life is meant to be.

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