I feel like I've been underestimated my entire life.

RedPimpin · 2019-12-22T09:00:47+00:00

i dont think its height related, i'm tall but feel exactly the same, i think being too available is the problem.. most of the people i know could not stand, let alone walk in my shoes for one single day

i am better in every single angle of life than most of these simpletons.. be it money, fitness, intelligence, language skills... whatever you can name

my advice: become more unavailable and keep working on your craft... i think at one point you will be so far ahead that there is no comparison anymore, they will be on earth and you will be somewhere in the galaxy

CrackDaMarco · 2019-12-22T09:47:13+00:00

You lucky dog. I wish I was underestimated more often

CrackDaMarco · 2019-12-22T11:07:05+00:00

[deleted]

KrissVectorEOC · 2019-12-22T14:32:12+00:00

Have ran into similar types of scenarios as well. Although you may have shed most of the "Mr. Nice Guy" frame internally and through your actions in not letting others use you and you expecting nothing for lending a helping hand, your outward exterior may still present itself as being a "Mr. Nice Guy."

One book that I read explains this really well in that if you're gregarious and smiling at all times and give this type of behavior away freely to the World then why would they put it any work to 'earn' this behavior. I know it sounds transactional but that's not it's intent.

I love amusing myself and don't care what anyone thinks about me anymore so it's been something to refine in myself to be able to contain that energy more because it's often the case where the jokester becomes the butt of the joke themselves. This is somewhat complicated, especially if you're just naturally amused yourself. Viewing it from a perspective of Stoicism, it is another form of calm balance and control of one's emotions to not be the gregarious talker. Sometimes saying less with fewer words does seem to carry more weight not only in the eyes of colleagues but especially with women as well, while, the aura of mystery remains.

deville05 · 2019-12-22T10:28:22+00:00

Oh quit whining man. Yr 5'9" not 5'4" and by the sound of everything else you are getting everything you want. Appreciate what you have cuz now yr just overthinking especially when you say... I think people think xyz about me.

Hungboy6969420 · 2019-12-22T13:19:42+00:00

I feel like alot of men here could post this. I've had a similar conversation with a friend before and we sort of felt the same w regards to our friends. Honestly, just do your thing and have low expectations for others socially.

theUnBannableHulk · 2019-12-22T11:59:08+00:00

You have been underestimated because you are living in a culture which discourages and underestimates men

What are you gonna do about it

19abto · 2019-12-23T09:47:33+00:00

I feel your point on height a lot - I’ve been 5’10 since 13 y/o and it’s fucked w/ my head pretty much since then (especially having played basketball my whole life and watching my peers, w/ short parents, shoot up to 6’4+) and how I’ve been received socially. I do feel hope tho because of guys in MMA like Firas Zahabi, Matt Serra, chad mendes, Demetrius Johnson, etc. etc. who are all 5’9/under who’ve talked about ppl that’ve tried to ridicule/disrespect them yet they still come out on top asserting themselves. These guys are basically trained professional killers, yet they still deal w/ all the bullshit that comes w/ being their height.

I think for a certain height-range, being underestimated is just a part of the package, and the win/boost in self-esteem/alpha/w.e. u wanna call it lies in coming out on top of that underestimation by still being able to assert yourself regardless of it.

thrwy75479 · 2019-12-22T18:53:56+00:00

I feel like I've been tested my whole fucking life

Everyone goes through this. All the time.

A great example of using this as an advantage is the Kardashians. They've supposedly got fame, and wealth, and yet people shit on them all the time on a large scale.

It's human nature to shit on others. We all do it. Sometimes people do it on purpose, sometimes it's unintended, and simply received that way. Most of the time it's people taking out their own problems on others. Life isn't easy.

However, rare are the people that would go out of their way to ruin your life, i.e., generally, people don't want to kill other people. Otherwise, we'd have been extinct long ago.

I've always had a great sense of humour, no problems with getting laid or having the girl I wanted, reasonably intelligent person and fair, I'm also a musician (drummer) and have been since I was very young which has helped with SMV incredibly, especially as I'm pretty good at it and can make a profit, too - plus I just love it regardless of any other benefits, I'm also decent in a scrap, and know a bit of MMA since my earlier life as well. I read a decent amount of books, especially a lot of the books that I've seen recommended here.

yawn

What's wrong, still can't afford a Ferrari, or a penthouse in NYC?

I think all-round I'm not a terrible person, but for some reason, I feel like I've been tested my whole fucking life.

You probably come across as someone who's full of himself. Even if you don't put down others, you likely don't give much attention to others because you're too self-absorbed. Not valuing others' opinions, and taking criticism, this can come across as arrogance.

made a stupid decision a few months back to essentially hard NEXT everyone and isolate myself, which has obviously gone against me

You're agitated because you're not where you wanted to be in life. When you got tested, you lashed out by isolating yourself because you realized you're actually not that special based on however you've defined uniqueness.

Perhaps you feel you don't have as much status, power, wealth, or looks as you try to appear to have. In other words, your self-esteem is unfounded. That is, you feel good when in actuality you don't have a solid foundation upon which to feel good about yourself.

This is why you were qualifying yourself to the people here by saying you've done this, and that, and you can beat people up, while playing music, yada, yada, yada.

You're looking to belong. Perhaps achieving more, and climbing greater heights, will bring you to a place of acceptance.

Title	I feel like I've been underestimated my entire life.
Author	CrackDaMarco
Upvotes	14
Comments	39
Date	December 22, 2019 8:11 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/ee2jf8/i_feel_like_ive_been_underestimated_my_entire_life/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/i-feel-like-ive-been-underestimated-my-entire-life.302571 https://theredarchive.com/post/302571

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