Been a lurker here for about 6 months and learned a lot. Been consistently practicing opening IRL and online (occasionally closing), several years since wife left after a long marriage (yeah, I know—it took that to wise me up). I’m early 60s, fit, and accomplished, so I think it just makes more options for me.

It occurred to me that a lot of guys are dissatisfied with their situation (wife or girlfriend lets herself go) and wants a better deal and leaves. In fact, this is probably the cause of a lot of divorces.

Question: what’s the difference between hypergamy and a guy leaving someone he’s made promises to? Doesn’t the same logic apply to both sexes (one partner will leave if they think they can get a better deal)? In the guy’s case it would be someone hotter, more “fertile.”

We shame women (rightly) for this behavior, but don’t guys deserve the same condemnation—in fact, more, since we are more likely to be raised with male values like loyalty, honor, and commitment?

Obviously, if you don’t make promises, you won’t break them. It’s just that I don’t see "hypergamy" as a problem unique to females. Maybe someone can enlighten me?