I earn six figures and married for the first time in my late 30s. I got to the point where I loved being single, loved the freedom to make plans based on just myself, loved the peace of not having to cater to the male ego or anyone at all. I loved long bouts of solitude.

I met someone a couple years ago I could finally see myself marrying, we got married a few months ago and I kept thinking I would adjust but the fact is, I haven't and I'm miserable a lot.

I just dont see what the purpose of marriage is for women who can provide for themselves and dont want children. Love and companionship? Sounds nice. The reality, having someone around ALL THE TIME? Someone to judge you and bitch and nag? Oddly all the things men complain about women are what I've had to deal with from most men I've dated. Controlling, needy, nagging me to change, dont seem to have their own life or hobbies and depending on me for constant validation. I'm exhausted. Then they wonder where the chill, fun loving woman was they met. She was single, and seems to die when I'm with someone.

I'm beginning to think I'm just not cut out for relationships but then I think- would I feel differently if I made less money or wanted kids and NEEDED a man?

What I feel like I truly need is to be left the hell alone. I really wanted to give marriage and honest go but I just find myself fantasizing about when I lived alone and had peace and quiet and could do whatever I wanted. I keep reading that relationships and sacrifice are the way to happiness and a full life but the fact is I'm happier and more at peace alone.

Please tell me I'm not the only one. I feel like a sociopath.