Back when I was 15 and a freshman in high school, I met this girl, let's call her Liz, she was a year older than me, and damn I fell for her

She was white, slanted eyes, pretty, brunette hair, slim and sexy, but with a happy childish innocence to her face, like she was smiling all the time, and laughing at everything but it wasn't fake, a little bit dumb? Maybe but with a nice attitude and cuteness to make up for it

I awkwardly approached her and started conversating, and to my surprise she was pretty nice, she responded greatly to everything and was super nice, a bit of chit chat I found out she lived like 300 mts from my house, which was even nicer!

After a while we became closer, we talked a lot and became good friends, and DAMN i fell in love, hard I was convinced this was my epic teenage love, I loved her a lot, she felt slightly out of my league, both lookswise and moneywise (she's rich AF), but she wasn't that popular on school and (surprisingly) no guy was after her, so I felt like fate had put us together and I just had to play my cards right

Quite some time passed and we became more formal, I went to her house, she went to mine, I knew her parents and she knew mine, we weren't officially boyfriend and girlfriend, we weren't officially "dating" but we were pretty damn close, it was the best two years of my life....

I mentioned she was older than me remember? Well it matters, it never did during the whole thing as I was taller, broader and overall more imposing than her, so it was never a problem, but eventually she had to go to college, while I still had senior year of highschool

And she had a choice, that slightly awkward boy from high school that was well intentioned or the cock carrousel in college

She chose the later

She left for college and decided to "explore herself" and life, leaving me without a damn explanation, I didn't get a message, not even a "it's over" nothing, just snap of a finger and I'm gone, I don't exist to her, no replies to texts, not to calls, when I went to her house she was "busy" and I got completely ghosted

I understand I'm not owed anything by anyone, but I think it's basic decency if you're sending someone out of your life at least let them know

I fell into depression hard, I drank, didn't leave the house, stopped caring and became hopeless, meanwhile she had her instagram stories and updates, all done up, FULL OF MAKEUP, dressed in slutty short dresses and skirts and with an adult "sexy" look in her face

"Out with the girls"

"Just met this (Chad) 🤭"

"Night out with my besties"

"Bottle of gin for muuh gurls"

And I was alone in my dark room, missing her, and it was a very dark time for me, eventually I decides that enough was enough and I had to let go, started working out, stopped drinking, grew my hair, started running, improving my guitar and piano playing abilities, made friends, went out on a couple of trips to the beach, to the jungle, to islands and exotic locations with my friends

Got my life back together

Now I'm 20 years old, mastered both guitar and piano, know how to sing, 40 lbs of muscle heavier, and am much more ambitious and outgoing than ever before

And a few nights back I crossed paths with her, she looked... different and that's an understatement to how much she had changed, her youthful innocence now gone, her face covered in makeup and looking like she was made of porcelain, her hair platinum blonde and flashing, and her eyes seemed dead to me, it was the 1000 cock stare, she seemed dead and distant

We chatted for a bit, caught up a little bit and she asked me what I had studied, how I had been, complemented how good I looked and said in the end "let's hangout later, pleaseee tee hee"

I felt weak for a bit, almost paralyzed, picked myself up and replied "yeah sure, you'll see"

I don't want anything to do with her, anything

I'm not even sure I want a relationship with anyone at the moment, even less with her, I felt vulnerable by her but at the same time sorry at her

She noticed how different things had gone for us two, and she wanted the best of it

Crazy how going your own way changes things

Stay vigilant brothers and happy holidays