TW: My[30/f] husband [35/M] thought I was a home intruder on Halloween. We don't know how to move forward.

Regular reader of this sub, never thought I'd end up posting. I know this is "above reddit's paygrade", but we're looking for advice wherever we can get it.

We've been together for 5 years. My husband grew up extremely hard, in one of the worst areas in the country. He was heavily involved in crime and dealt with violence on a constant basis. For going on ten years, he's been through numerous rehabilitation programs, mentors teens who experience similar circumstances and he's absolutely turned himself around. He's never been threatening in the time I've known him, although he still deals with anxiety related ptsd triggers on occasion.

For Halloween, I got the idea to prank him after he got back from a late shift, at which point I'm usually asleep. I hid behind the shower curtain in my costume, which was of a cat burglar (picture the black ski masked crook shimmying down a wire past those lasers to steal a diamond like in movies). I'm 5'9, and this costume made me look a bit bulky. He came in quietly, and when he came into washroom I popped out from behind the curtain. Before I could reveal the joke, he attacked me. It was severe, and I couldn't tell him who I was as he had my throat, and my hands were under me in the tub. He screamed my name and told me to run, and started giving extremely dark threats to "me" telling me what he planned to do when "his wife got out", outright telling me he planned to kill me while continuing the assault and screaming my name. This only ended when my mask was pulled in a way that revealed my dyed hair through the eye holes and he pulled it off, seeing it was me.

He spends the rest of the night an inconsolable mess, and I had to actively stop him from calling the police on himself, from taking me to the hospital and from calling my friends and family, because I knew no matter what I said he'd end up arrested. I entirely blame myself for this, I knew his past, I knew he dealt with ptsd and I pranked him without thinking of how trapped he'd feel in that room or how protective he'd be of me. At the same time, I'm terrified. Not rationally, but reactively. I knew his history, but to experience it scared me beyond belief. The sheer violence of his attack and his threats and anger made me realize just what's still under the surface if pushed, even though my rational brain knows he was reacting to what he thought was a threat and he's been a gentle teddybear towards everyone for the entire time I've known him. He on the other hand blames himself entirely, has been crying on and off since Halloween and keeps apologizing, begging me to just leave him which I have no plans or desire to do. My face looks like I went through a meat grinder, and I cannot go into work or face my family like this, because I doubt they'd believe what actually happened.

We both just want to move forward from this nightmare. Please do not advise me to leave him, he's an amazing man who reacted to my ridiculous idea of a joke. What steps can we take to be around friends and family while I heal? What steps can we take to close this gap between us, put it behind us and love and support one another through this experience? What can I do to ease his guilt, while also reminding myself he's still the amazing man I married and not the person I encountered that night? Any advice on where to start (we both have therapists) would be appreciated.

TL;DR: Played stupid prank on husband suffering from bad experiences. Thought I was a home invader and attacked me. Both of us wondering how to even begin to let this go.