My boyfriend (21M) is well-off and travelling, while I'm (20F) broke, stuck in shit conditions and struggling to put food on my plate. It's making me feel pathetic and worthless, and it's getting increasingly difficult to be happy for him. Help?

2,010 points•349 comments•submitted by throwawayway10106 to r/relationship_advice

We've been together for a year, been best friends for 3 years before that. My boyfriend comes from a wealthy family while mine has always been quite poor. I love him and care about him a lot and I have never been jealous of his wealth, I've always paid for my own things and haven't/don't expect him to pay for me.

However recently things have been especially tough for me, I live alone as I have no other options and am a student, due to certain circumstances (sick family member, debt and a few other things) life has been EXTREMELY difficult for me recently. I work when I'm not studying and come home late in the night, then rush to college in the morning, rince and repeat. Almost everything I earn goes to pay the rent and internet (which I need for college). Most of the days I have nothing to eat, and it won't be an exaggeration to say I mostly survive on bread, eggs and ramen noodles. I'm extremely tired, depressed and constantly have suicidal thoughts.

My boyfriend left 2 months ago to travel the EU and take language courses. He constantly sends me pictures of the things he's up to, cliché pics of expensive food, hotels, pools etc. I've always been very excited and happy for him when he's having a good time, but at the moment it's become too much to handle. I know it will probably sound shallow but I don't want to see pictures of him having steak with red wine and everything when my best meal in the last 6 months has been a chicken pie and most of the days I'm just starving.

He knows of my current situation and while I know he isn't trying to mock me, it often feels like it. It's like he's rubbing it in my face, although he isn't doing that deliberately. It still makes me angry at him. I can't keep up a conversation with him anymore because he always disappears mid-conversation and then comes back with a pic of him at a party or something titled "sorry was afk", and then disappears again. He makes me feel even more lonely than I already am. I love him but I'm constantly so mad and upset with him. It just hurts so much. I'm miserable and have no idea what to do. I'm losing the only friend and a person that loves me over these feelings and I don't know how to stop them.

Help.

Edit: Thank you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I am overwhelmed by the amount of kindness and support people have shown. Thank you for taking the time out of your lives to read my post and for leaving a lot of useful advice and insight. I have read every single comment so far and I have been trying to reply to every comment and I'm so sorry that I haven't responded to all of them. I've been bawling my eyes out reading them this entire time, I just feel numb right now.

To the people that have messaged me or commented offering to help me with food or money, I am at loss of words. The amount of generosity, kindness, humanity and selflessness you have in your hearts to offer help to a complete stranger has touched my soul beyond describable. I hope I do not come off as ungrateful, I cannot possibly put in words how much I appreciate people offering me help, but as I have already replied to some of you, thank you so, so much but I do not want to and won't be taking anything.

If you know someone in your life that's been struggling with food and basic necessities, please, please offer them the help! I know it will mean the world to them.

Thank you for everything.