I have relapsed. I need some help or understanding.

tdkte · 2018-03-25T21:47:45+00:00

You'll be all right man, feelings pass. Don't dwell on them, embrace them and try to be grateful for what you have.

But most importantly: what's this book title?! ;)

orangespeaches · 2018-03-25T22:02:00+00:00

If I were you, I wouldn't break up with my current girlfriend cause you can't just show weakness and go back to that old love who was devoted to you at your worst, time will tell if your current LTR is worth it your time, and if it's not you can always go back. Her reaching out to you doesn't always mean she feels the same tingles she did back then. Just keep holding frame brother, keep talking to her if you wish but don't get too stuck on that oneitis, i would recommend you to arrange and go on a date with her and see how you feel after that.

CaptainTurbo55 · 2018-03-25T23:56:25+00:00

I know where you’re coming from. I feel even with all TRP teachings, many men will always be happier in a LTR with that one special girl. Sometimes no matter what you do, it just seems like you’ll never be as happy again without them.

Altiore1994 · 2018-03-25T23:05:07+00:00

Is it worth staying with a chick that isn't giving you those feelings? Then again you may be over glorifying those feelings and memories in your mind, and if you was to get back with her those feelings might not be the same.

greatamericancities · 2018-03-26T00:00:02+00:00

Enjoy the nostalgia. Let it wash over you and through you. Give it a few hours, or days, and return to your rational self. Start thinking about your strategy.

You have a good one in hand and (perhaps) a great one in the bush. What an opportunity! No matter how it plays out, this will be an experience. Every man should be so lucky.

thewrecker8 · 2018-03-26T00:26:31+00:00

Tough spot bro. There's a lot of variables here. You could have such strong feels for her because she was there for you when you were down and out and part of that is driving your emotions. And the fact that relationships like that are like that old broken in pair of sneakers. Even though they're old and shitty looking when you put them on they just feel so comfy. You want to just slip right back into what you remember was so comfy with this old gf.

That said a lot can happen to a person in the time you've been apart. Leaving however many guys she may or may not have been with aside. Life experiences may not make her the same girl she was. On the surface she might seem that way but you only spent a few hours talking with her. The chances of her being EXACTLY like you remember her aren't super high. You said you have a good LTR going on now. You're throwing the dice if you walk and old gf has a few more quirks or is a bit more jaded than you remember her as. Also remember the "honeymoon phase" of a relationship can go up to about 2 years. So who knows if it would've gone the distance anyway.

Ultimately what it sounds like you're lacking is another or different life goal. You have money, a business, good education, what's your end game? Get married start a family and retire? Remember do you..... women are secondary they're there to compliment your plan if they're worthy, not become your plan.

Easier said than done but I'd likely keep this one at a distance, you've got oneitis for her. And a oneitis can destroy a man by making her your everything. You're already thinking about getting rid of your current gf, what's next? Spending more time with her than focusing on your business, your body, your health, etc, etc. If possible keep her around just enough that she doesn't disappear just in case things go south with the current. Good luck.

SpiritualPicture · 2018-03-25T23:16:33+00:00

I never saw anything worth living for in my life before her.

Mmmmmmm. That's some strong beta there. Here let me help you. You said a few years, so I'll just assume 3 years ago. College age, I'm assuming fairly hot. We'll say half of those years serial monogamy and the other half "finding herself". That's 18 months of dating, say a hookup every 2 weeks or so. That's about 36 guys. Then say two to three month stints of serial monogamy is another 8 or so guys. So we are talking 44 guys who screwed her since you were with her last. Feel any better?

Title	I have relapsed. I need some help or understanding.
Author	Exodia324
Upvotes	9
Comments	17
Date	March 25, 2018 9:33 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/873wx1/i_have_relapsed_i_need_some_help_or_understanding/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/i-have-relapsed-i-need-some-help-or-understanding.49357 https://theredarchive.com/post/49357

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