Introduction.
This is my first post, so please be easy on me. Also, english is not my first language, so please consider this too. I will tell the story of my latest relationship as an example how things can go when you don’t take the pill, act full beta and suffer from oneitis. I’m very interested in your reactions. I know it’s long but maybe it's a good read.

So here I go, fasten your seatbelts.

I had this LTR that started in the summer of 2014 with an 19 years old, blonde, HB8ish, smart, short, very open, easy going fun girl with an athletic body. I was a confident guy at the time who did not give a fuck about everything, no work, education whatsoever, but I was fit and had a lot of money. The relationship went amazing, we were the couple everyone talked about, we would marry, we fitted perfectly they said. We had amazing sex, we had so much in common, she would eventually almost live with me, it was such a good time back then.

After a first good year.

She finished her school with great grades and she wants to join a university 4 hours away from where we live now, without hesitation. ‘’Sure, go on, do what makes you happy, do what you want to do, we will survive it.’’ She agreed, we will survive this. It was a test though, we both said but this is real.She actually motivated me to go to school also and I thank her for that and done that also. Summarized, it was all very very good from this moment, from the moment she packed her bag to go to campus, shit hits the fan.

The last year we had this relationship, or should I say, just my turn.

It is September 2015. She now lives in a campus dorm with 12 roommates, around 9 dudes on a huge university 4 hours away from me. From the moment she was there, contact went sloppy. The first two weeks she had something like an introduction week, so you can meet new people with activities and drink shit tons of alcohol. She made new female friends she said and I was happy for her. I also noticed some dudes she added on social media and instantly liking each others shit. No hard feelings, I didn’t bother me. So, she came back after this two weeks, everything seems still ok. But definitely not behaving the same as before. There was something changed. Fast forward some weeks from that. We had a party of a good friend of mine, I took her with me, because she came every weekend to my place. I noticed she would text with a guy a lot, even when i’m standing next to her. I asked her of course; “Who is that?” “Oh, just a guy from my university I met” Oh ok, cool, no hard feelings. It was the same guy who would literally like everything on social media of her. Later on, she told me it was her ‘mentor’ on this introduction week, so he had her number for this reason. He was just a friend and they just texted casually. Let’s call him mr. W. I became suspicious, because I don’t believe in this ‘he is just a friend’ bullshit. He seemed to have one intention: fuck her brains out. And afterwards, he wanted to meet her a lot of times and they did. Always asked her where she was, what she’s doing. Come to my place and drink some beer with me. She said they met in clubs and cafes. Not on purpose, just accidently when she was with her friends. I don’t believe this either when you have casual contact via text, and who knows more. Also during this time she talks alot about this one male roommate, let’s call him mr. R (will tell you more about this later) When she came home one day in the weekends after a trip to Berlin with her parents I noticed that she is suddenly very very defensive of her phone. Not obvious, but seriously noticeable by me. So I confronted her about this. I knew something was not right. I wanted to look in her phone, so I did. Suddenly no messages of mr. W, no WhatsApp chats, nothing. I swiped to the left to see the the incoming and outcoming WhatsApp calls. There it was: outcoming missed call to mr.W the night before we met on 00:30 called from her hotel in Berlin. She said she accidently pressed the call button while they were chatting. But where was the chat? You guessed it. Everything they said to each other was deleted by her before she went to my home to see me. Her face went red and she did not know what to say. Busted? She admitted she was wrong, I sort of dumped her because I was mad as fuck of course. Sneaky bitch.

Week after this.

She missed me, she apologized, we talked very good about this and gave her a change to change her mistake. She was not cheating on me, it was just friendship she said. Yeah, she actually thinks it’s friendship when only she thinks it’s friendship while mr. W wants to creampie her. Told her this fact, she wouldn’t agree, this is confusing. It’s clearly the attention of him, that he wants to fuck her and doing so much effort for a vagina. She loves it and wanted to keep it. So much she even keeps contact after I dumped her and taking her back. She made every excuse to keep it, trying to let me think it was really just a friendship in two weeks and nothing else. I don’t fall for this for bullshit. I keep yelling at her, I keep pulling on her, to stop the bullshit because I know what’s going on. She denied it over and over again that it’s just friendship and she deleted it, because she was afraid for my reaction. I was overreacting and just jealous she said. Why would I even get mad when there is nothing to be mad about? The only thing I eventually achieved with this, is that she will screenshot everything he will send her and then send the screenshot to me. She did this just once. I still hated it of course. And kind of dumped her again. She came back and said “I will cut all the contact with him because it comes in between us” No shit Sherlock. So I took her back again with high hopes... I know, I know... Everything that happened from now on, caused simply by the fact that I couldn’t trust her anymore, period. Everything she said could be an illusion and just fake words. I needed to dump her earlier, when I just caught her deleting it. But I was too good for her, I loved her. You know the typical beta shit, you pull up.

Ok, so now about this one roommate guy, you remember?

While this all happened, the roommate guy I told you earlier about (mr.R) did everything for her. Bringing her coffee/tea, gave her presents, doing stuff for her. They cook together, they swim together, they fitness together, they smoked weed together, drink together. Without asking, he proposed all of this. She was letting him do this, she was using him. Her door was literally always wide open. Why would he do all this? Vagina. When she was with me at home, she would talk a lot about mr. R, so yes of course I get also suspicious about this guy. How nice he was, how they get along so great, they even had a click she said. He was basically her weekdays beta boyfriend. She basically cheated on me emotionally in the weekdays. And the funny part was, we did nothing in the weekends anymore, she wanted to hang on the sofa or in my bed and watch Netflix all day. When I said something about this, she replied that I was not her daddy. She of course already did fun things on weekdays with mr. R. and was ‘’exhausted’ in the weekends of all these activities and going out.’’ I was replaced. She only needed me now for entertainment in the weekends, comfort, a place to sleep and someone to sleep with. She did not wanted to change this, I was the one who was just very jealous. “Nothing to worry about right?” ‘’This is the girl of my dreams” said friends Beta Bob, Mr.NiceGuy and me. “Just accept it, it’s just who she is personally.” She can’t stop it, even when it makes me sad. Later on I went from suspicious to very suspicious, looked in her phone more and more times and she would be more and more defensive about her phone. I found out that she would even text and send memes to mr.R roommate when she was with me in my house, looking for fun. Even her ex boyfriend is now in her phone and on every social media platform and she likes shit from him. They even met accidentally somewhere in public and talked for a while. She was so happy, he can finally treat her nice again. But hey, nothing to worry about right? boyfriend? Got mad, fights and dumps. After that we occasionally had contact via text, some messages insulting, some apologizing.

After that...
I got heartbroken, I hated her behaviour, but loved her who she first was. Good memories haunted me everywhere. Oneitis sucks balls. Oh, and I found out from a girlfriend of her that mr. W asked her out instantly when we broke up. "No, it was not like a date or something, just ehhh drink something together like friends and I said no so don't worry" Yes babe, sure. He just asked you out to drink something without any further goals. Women hamstering when they don't want to reveal the truth and it makes you questioning your own logics. Was it all my fault? Who’s fault was it? Was I just a pussy? Was she just a bitch? I blamed myself, went full beta mode, got on the train with a bag full of clothes and visited her. We talked and she said she couldn’t love me anymore at this time because of what all happened and it would take time. She needed time etc. I insulted her earlier, I was being disrespectful, short: It was basically all my fault. The typical shit. I seriously said sorry, slept in her room, had the best sex I ever had and did fun things together the next day. “We will just see where this is going” The day after that, I left her room and went home because she went on vacation with a girlfriend she planned when I was not around in one of our ‘breaks’. We had steady contact via text and she even told me she missed me so much. When she came back she only visited me that weekend and she really wanted to go back fast to her own house. Why? She had nothing there at the time, she had a vacation break, no school work, no job there, nothing. Only her room, oh and don’t forget her male attention givers. It was more important than spending time with me.

What did I do next?

Yep, I went with her to her place and stayed there for a week, we again did fun things, got out, shopped, ate in restaurants etc. But the door of her room was always open for the guys, her attention givers. It even was sort of a competition between the guys, who would give more, who would give nicer presents, who will she like more? who will she fuck first? It was so sad. I was just there doing things with her, and mr.R or another one would ask her out of the room and give her stuff like cookies, drinks and other presents. Or they would make an appointment with my girlfriend, to go skateboarding with her e.g. including a free skateboard that she can keep. All while I was there one week. It made me mad and confused and every time I said something about this: “Don’t appoint so much etc.” “Don’t be so jealous” Not to mention I didn’t even wanted to think about what she does on her phone that time. Fights about the same fucking shit she did not wanted to change for ‘the love of her life’ like she called me. She could not even change it she said. We went to my home together that friday and after that she went on vacation with her parents.After that trip I only saw her in that upcoming weekend, and as fast as possible she went straight to her place again. It’s so interesting there.

The ending.
She came to my hometown that weekend, that thursday we had a party together and we went there ‘together’, she acted distancing the whole time. We promised she will sleep at my place, we had no sex and she left the bed early. The upcoming week after that strange weekend, there was a big festival in my city, so a week long tourists everywhere, every day alcohol and music on the streets. My girl was GONE. Literally GONE. No contact, she would not even reply to me. Very uninteresting behaviour, only wanted to do her own things, very distancing, left me alone at the time. Doing things without me, but with other people. Only wanted to meet when i’m almost on my knees. It was horrible. Every day she would go out with other people and forget me totally. That week she added six new guys on Facebook (one guy a day?) The last time I met her, we drank some coffee at my place while I yelled my lungs out asking why she treated me that way. I almost had to pull her in my house. She was cold and cool and told me afterwards she basically backstabbed me for a week long: “Well, I guess I just have doubts about my feelings for you.’’ OH OK BYE.

Conclusion.

During the last few weeks, I discovered TRP, read so much. I felt I was betrayed my whole life, I could not believe this. I wanted to prove otherwise. Are women really like that? Is it never going to work BluePill style? It was more like an social experiment for me just to experience the real truth behind this all. Atleast it was all a very good lesson with a painful outcome. But I chose it.

Lessons learned:

  • Don’t go back to your ex, hoping it will get any better. BluePill stays BluePill, she will not take you serious anymore.

  • When things don't go right because of her behaviour, that's even your fault.

  • Hard next, no contact immediately the first time she disrespects you on this level.

  • Don’t try to change the female brain, they don’t really love you, they don’t even want to change her behaviour for you. She will only think about herself.

  • When there are branches to swing, she’s gone like a snap of a finger.