While self hatred may appear to be the correct response to a person who continually falls short of expectations, it doesn't actually generate any positive change. In theory punishing yourself for your shortcomings can produce self-discipline. In practice, self-hatred and punishment ultimately lead to a person becoming frustrated, then downtrodden, then impotent. Failure begets more failure, and you lose the ability to envision a way out.
Self hatred is also unglorifying to God. This GotQuestions link covers the topic quite well. To summarize:
Self hatred is not the attitude of a redeemed individual
It is resentful to the God who made us
It is a focusing on the past instead of striving towards our calling as Christians
It's rooted in a living for worldly ideals or not realizing the full nature of redemption through Christ (or both).
My question is: How do you fix self hatred?
HOW IT PERTAINS TO ME:
I hate myself because I am the source of all of my problems. If you excised my brain and replaced my personality with a computer program, you would have a wildly successful individual. I can see how my choices have created the problems I now live with, but I don't appear to learn from my mistakes. I fear that I am unregenerate at my core and that my behavioral changes are merely skin deep.
I believe that a person's true nature shows itself when he is under stress. Strip away everything from a man, and the true self will be the only thing that is left. I don't like what I see when I fail or lose something I value.
I don't want self-delusion tactics that only treat symptoms. I want to treat the cause. Potential and belief are nothing without results.