My friend has been dating a guy for two years.

· He will only see her one time a week, apperently because “his university program requires him study all the time and he has work” yet just this semester, he decided that he had time to join an intermural sports team and become a club executive, and it’s ok because “it’s not like he just hangs out with his friends, on weeks where he has time to hang out with his friends he also makes sure to hang out with me.”

· He sort of has anger issues. Example: one time he got so mad he started banging his head agasint the steering wheel while driving. Example: once in a fight he said he felt like throwing himself off the balcony becuase he was so fustrated.

· He broke up with her because he “deosn’t have time for her,” but wanted her back promising to make things change. She took him back. He now MAYBE sees her more than one time a week hooray. The other day she excitedly went “guess what?!!? finally has time to stay over tonight!” since this was an exception for her, not the norm.

· For the longest time he had her instagram password and would constantly look through all of her DM’s until she found out and changed it. She forgave him.

· Constantly tells her that she is asking for to much when she tries to solve problems

· He “lets other girls flirt with him” but “doesn’t actively flirt with other girls.” Hmm….

Another mutal friend and I have been trying to tell her that this man is not worth it, but she keeps telling us that things are getting better and that they are working on it. Recently at a dinner, we might have both been a bit too harsh/straight up with her and she told us that that night she felt really awful about it and ended up crying when she got home, and that she wished that we would support her and recognize that things have been getting better, and that they really have been “at the best point they have been.” Are we too harsh in trying to push her to break up? Should we be more acknowleding that maybe he is working at being a better boyfriend? Is there a better way to deal with this situation and encourage her to value her own needs and wants more without seeming like we are just ganging up on her? I genuinely feel pretty bad that she ended up in tears afterwards. Any general tips regarding this situation would be appreciated. She is a great person who has her shit together in basically every other aspect of her life, is well educated, stable income, great friends and hobbies etc.

I may delete this soon becuase I am thinking of introducing her to this thread!!!