DAE want to discuss how it can be challenging to shut off our brain's past trauma, limiting beliefs, and other SHIT we consciously are aware of that are not serving us well in the past when we are dating a (seemingly) healthy HVM (at least 4-5 months)?

What are your challenges with this? What are some strategies you use to turn off these thoughts and not project shit? I am focusing on me and try to cope with other things when I get in these modes but want some suggestions on how to find other ways that can help me level up more!

Still in recovery from years of pickmeisha behaviors, therapy, and processing past toxic romantic partner treatment. I am in a place where I am confident, love myself, and am establishing healthy boundaries with the love, support and tools of this beautiful community!!! I am dating a man who seems (b/c you can never guarantee with 100% certainty) HV and one of the most challenging things for me is:

1) not projecting past hurt/trauma from (toxic) "love" onto our relationship which (so far) is very healthy

2) realizing/processing how much I thought I needed to endure from men before I found one that is willing to give me all I want and more

3) being overwhelmed with joy and positive emotions from feeling respected, heard, valued, affirmed as well as have my boundaries respected

4) realizing my expectations are not unreasonable and I deserve to put myself first. The right man that is emotionally intelligent and healthy will respect your boundaries and meet your expectations because they love you in a healthy manner

Let's discuss Queens!

Mods feel free to change flair, I was torn between "seeking advice" and "discussion" TBH...<3