Women are shamed when they are raped and society thinks rape culture is a joke

sweetpotatocupcake · 2020-07-28T02:42:06+00:00

I am so sorry that someone did that to you. Not just being raped but your shitty friends/family who doubled down on reinforcing rape culture. Your post describes very well the problem I have with the attitude people have when women are raped or even just mistreated by men and the attitude is "they (the women) should've known better".

I've even seen it on this sub too more than I'd like and it's very frusturating. Yes we can learn from our past, and make better choices in the future (for things we ACTUALLY always have control of, see: NOT abuse or rape) but we don't need to subscribe to the culture that already blames women enough in the process.

Men still need to be held accountable for their harmful actions towards women. Perpetrators need consequences for their actions, stop blaming women for the shitty choices men make.

Sorry, off my soap box .

BackgroundPlankton8 · 2020-07-28T02:51:43+00:00

This burns me up. They very may well have expected to have sex. They probably did. But their expectations does not equal consent. What a dumb thing to think.

I may expect to get a promotion at work. But if I was passed over, I don’t show up for my “new job” that I don’t have anyway. Expectations don’t really matter.

2020-07-28T10:20:34+00:00

Society pandering to and bootlicking men disgusts me and made me lose respect for both society and man. Man could literally eat his own raw sh.t and society would say 'boys will be boys'.

I'm sorry everyone failed you like this, op.

pickmieshaexorcist · 2020-07-28T13:04:08+00:00

I hate this mentality of just because a woman gets drunk or a little wild, or goes to a party, or is just AT a location like a house, it gives people license to treat her body like public property.

I always tell people with this mentality to imagine a man. Imagine the drunkest man you’ve ever seen. He’s at a party and he’s stripped all his clothes off and is dancing around. Oh and the party is hosted by a bigger man who has sexual desire for this drunken man. So I guess it’s totally cool for people to accost the drunk man right? Hold him down and assault him, and that host can just go ahead and fuck him because he’s drunk and naked and obviously wants it, right?

See, when it’s a man, people get uncomfortable at the thought of people just taking it upon themselves to use and abuse him just because the opportunity presented itself. Because men are recognized as fully human with bodily sovereignty that isn’t negated just because he’s drunk, naked or whatever.

But because women are culturally considered objects for sexual use those rules don’t apply. We are just toys and so, if we don’t want to be “used”, we need to make sure we put ourselves away. If we are left “out” then it’s our fault we get used like the objects we are. (Of course that’s what women are told, to follow these rules, but as we know they don’t work anyway, trapping women in a catch 22).

TerryTerrorCO · 2020-07-28T16:33:42+00:00

I’m sorry you went through something so bad like this. I’ve been sexually assaulted and my family basically didn’t give a shit and one time when we were arguing, played the fucking rape card and blames it on me, my own mother.

Some people just never understand until it happens to them. It makes me so sick

Derivative31224 · 2020-07-28T17:37:53+00:00

sadly this is completely relatable, its pretty heart breaking when your experiences are invalidated by people you consider "friends" and "family". my heart goes out to you. <3

Title	Women are shamed when they are raped and society thinks rape culture is a joke
Author	vaginaprobs_
Upvotes	92
Comments	8
Date	July 27, 2020 7:12 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/hyypss/women_are_shamed_when_they_are_raped_and_society/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/women-are-shamed-when-they-are-raped-and-society.718768 https://theredarchive.com/post/718768

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