obligatory "looking to settle down"

bruh_what_the_f · 2020-11-14T19:02:35+00:00

a 19 year old looking to settle down! Those are RARE!

I wonder if something happened to her to cause her to re-evaluate her negotiation strategy on the dating market?

InevitableOwl1 · 2020-11-14T19:07:38+00:00

This is a good example for the new "A new pattern" thread focusing on the last line

She admits to a string of casual hookups despite being only 19. It will never cease to amaze me how they don't realise that saying thing like "any more" reveal far more than they intend

InevitableOwl1 · 2020-11-14T19:03:49+00:00

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InevitableOwl1 · 2020-11-14T19:26:33+00:00

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Aronacus · 2020-11-14T19:36:59+00:00

[deleted]

Typo-MAGAshiv · 2020-11-14T21:07:08+00:00

Holy shit, this one... Time to bring back my drinking game!

*looks over picture*

Multi-colored hair. Red flag! *shot*

Thousand cock stare, at ONLY 19 YEARS OLD. Double red flag! *shot* shot

Tattoo on the back of her hand. Aside from face and neck, just about the most short-sighted and irresponsible place to get one. Red flag! *shot*

Fat. Yuck 🤢🤮 Red flag! *shot*

OK, on to the wordsh of the profile...

single mum...

Red flag! 1 shot per kid! Oh, only one. *shot* shtill eliminatesh her from conshideration for *hiccup* commitment, as you'd be shpending your reshources on another man'sh cumshot. Hell, thish one ishn't even ONS-worthy, unlessh you like fat depresshios.

looking to settle down

Cliche! *shot* keep in mind, gentsh, jusht what that hiccup phrase meansh:

1) she'sh shettling, which meansh she conshidersh you beneath her. She thought she could do better, and failed.

2) "down" - she'sh lowering her shtandardsh because she needsh those beta-bucksh.

3) fun time is over. She'sh had her fun already, with other men. No more fun. Time to get to work. SHO GET TO IT, MULE! raise her kid she consheived with the man *hiccup* she really wanted.

OK, tangent-rant over. Back to the game!

completed little family

Cliche and red flag simultaneoushishly! 2 shotsh! *shot* *shot* I alwaysh marveled at the audashity of hobag shingle momsh who thought "ready-made family" *hiccup* or some variation was actually a shelling point. "Yesh, shpend your time, money, reshources, exertion, et shettera on shum other guy'sh kid! But wait, there're more! Act now and you can experienche the inevitable dead bedroom phase of a marriage in half the time of an average marriage, because she was never attracted to you in the firsht place and jusht wantsh your resources!"

Sherioushly, don't ever commit to shingle momsh. hiccup I've sheen that schenario play out sheveral timesh with buddiesh.

please no mess abouts, can't be doing with those no more

Cliche and red flag combined again! *shot* *shot*

That'sh the kind of guy she actually prefersh because he's "sho exshiting" and a "free shpirit", but she learned he will never commit.

Ok, time to go passh out...

Aaod · 2020-11-15T00:30:37+00:00

[deleted]

TakeaChillPillWill · 2020-11-15T01:33:28+00:00

I love that patented Billie Eilish thousand-cock stare women think is so attractive these days. I would love to date a miserable, emotionally detached sourpuss!

IncorrigibleLee86 · 2020-11-15T01:44:20+00:00

A broke 30 year old with at least 2 baby mamas is going to be chatting her up. You know, I know it.

Jake-Orion · 2020-11-14T22:51:32+00:00

Yeah...her parents dropped her ass and she needs a provider ASAP. That's why she's looking for a permanent partner at 19.

SylvestorTalone · 2020-11-14T20:38:50+00:00

Damn she looks like she's been through the ringer, and only 19?

I guess there is a kind of logic to it, if you head at literally light speed towards the wall, you can get there while you're still fertile.

ltde5150 · 2020-11-15T02:33:35+00:00

Hon, you're supposed to look for someone to settle down with before having a baby.

NickTesla2018 · 2020-11-15T02:52:29+00:00

Isn't she the villain from 101 Dalmatians ?!

Typo-MAGAshiv · 2020-11-15T15:50:50+00:00

Has the wall moved to 20?

InevitableOwl1 · 2020-11-15T02:55:28+00:00

[deleted]

Chimimouryou16 · 2020-11-15T03:13:36+00:00

19??? She looks 32.

Enough-Staff-2976 · 2020-11-15T06:52:52+00:00

The fat grenade has been pulled. She realizes that she needs to settle down because her waist is having a growth spurt.

SocialAssassin4Hire · 2020-11-15T09:38:08+00:00

No more mess abouts? You are the mess about!

bablfish · 2020-11-16T06:46:36+00:00

19yo nothing to achieveand finished with life ... wow .. how about getting a job and starting a life of your own ?

Lameador · 2020-11-16T08:41:39+00:00

I am sure her next guy will be delighted to learn that he was part of an upward settlement

2020-11-16T18:39:48+00:00

Settle down to ones like her means a whipping post for all of her angst and a free babysitter so she can go and continue to party.

asdf333aza · 2020-11-19T01:20:37+00:00

"Pre-made family, insert fatherly figure with paycheck here".

Dumloko · 2020-11-14T21:54:37+00:00

Searching for commitment while looking like she's gonna kidnap your puppies for their fur...

sleepyweaselisawake · 2020-11-15T02:23:56+00:00

Look how happy and fulfilled she is.. imagine that could be you!

Natuasi · 2020-11-15T03:24:52+00:00

Her vagina is probably still healing from pushing out that baby and she can’t wait to jump right back on the CC.

covettonhouse · 2020-11-18T04:14:49+00:00

A teenager and already a single mom... 😟

Title	obligatory "looking to settle down"
Author	PinochetDIdNothngBad
Upvotes	127
Comments	70
Date	November 14, 2020 6:57 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/comments/ju74c5/obligatory_looking_to_settle_down/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/obligatory-looking-to-settle-down.733415 https://theredarchive.com/post/733415

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